Happy Independence Day! Speaking of Independence...
Posted on July 04, 2014 by Diane Passage, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
Independent is an empowerment word. It’s one of those ideals that we all strive for- being an independent woman, raising an independent child...
Independent: not influenced or controlled by others in matters of opinion, conduct, etc; thinking or acting for oneself; not subject to another’s authority or jurisdiction; not relying on others for aid or support.
Independent is an empowerment word. It’s one of those ideals that we all strive for- being an independent woman, raising an independent child, being an independent thinker and so on. Because the opposite – dependent – can sometimes imply weakness, immaturity, being controlled, and other things that can be perceived as negative.
There often is a lot of pressure for people to be independent, and the truth is that everyone needs a little bit of support at times in their lives. There could be many reasons such as going through a particularly difficult time, changing careers, starting over, etc. And happy occasions too especially during major life transitions that bring on stress such as marriage, having a baby, buying a home and more.
As a life coach, I speak to a lot of clients and potential clients who express disappointment because they’re seeking help from coaches for things they feel they should be able to do on their own as mentally healthy individuals. However, the coaching process can be an independent process even though you are partnering with a coach. Because I’m not my clients’ personal assistant, I don’t do any of the actual work for them so they’re essentially building themselves up. My job is to provide support, challenges, motivation and accountability. Therefore the heavy lifting is all up to them. It’s their responsibility to be dedicated, face challenges and follow through on commitment so they eventually transform themselves.
Making the decision to get support when you need it is definitely not a sign of weakness or dependence. Think of Fortune 500 CEOs- they’re not dispatching calls, making local deliveries, counting out petty cash, and facilitating mergers all by themselves. Having support is key- and we consider them successful and powerful because of it. They’re the bosses! As individuals, it’s ok for us to employ support as needed too… and not feel bad about it! Ideally it would be great if we could all be entirely independent – I imagine that would be a great, empowered feeling! Reality is that we don’t always feel like Superman or Superwoman everyday so the smartest thing we can do is get support when we need it.
As for independence – don’t worry – a great coach won’t have you depending on him/her for the rest of your life. A great coach will work with you efficiently so you accomplish your goals within a realistic timeframe and in a way that you become better, stronger, empowered and more independent!
Happy 4th everybody!
