Shame: its negative impacts, causes and resolution.
Posted on June 01, 2023 by Robin Goodwin, One of Thousands of Business Coaches on Noomii.
I have helped many clients free themselves from the weight of shame. This article recommends ways to resolve this powerful negative feeling too.
Shame can be a disabling emotion and difficult to deal with by yourself. This is where a good Therapeutic Coach can help. It can be caused by various situations such as past trauma, social stigma or negative self-talk. Often shame comes from the impact of not meeting the expectations you have of yourself, or not meeting the expectations you perceive others have of you, or other people not meeting the expectations you have of them. However, overcoming shame is crucial in order to improve mental health and overall well-being. Here are some ways you can overcome shame:
1. Recognize and acknowledge shame: It’s important to acknowledge and identify the feeling of shame. Simply labelling it can reduce its intensity.
2. Talk to someone: Talking to a trusted friend or mental health professional can help you process your emotions and gain a new perspective on the situation.
3. A Therapeutic Coach trained in Satir Transformational Systemic Therapy can bring you to a full awareness of any unmet expectations you have, and help you resolve them.
4. Challenge your negative self-talk: Self-talk can often be very negative, leading to feelings of shame. Learning to identify and challenge these negative messages can help you replace them with more positive ones.
5. Practice self-compassion: Practice self-compassion by treating yourself with kindness and empathy. Understand that nobody is perfect and that you’re allowed to make mistakes.
6. Reconnect with your values: Focus on your values and what’s important to you. Live according to your values and do things that are meaningful to you, which can help you regain a sense of purpose.
7. Let go of perfectionism: Striving for perfection can lead to feelings of shame, as it sets an unattainable standard. Allow yourself to make mistakes and learn from them.
Overcoming shame is a personal process and can take time. It’s essential to practice self-care and to be kind to yourself throughout the journey. With the right steps and support, it’s possible to overcome feelings of shame and lead a fulfilling life.