The Rocket Since Behind Shyness
Posted on December 19, 2019 by Vero Shalimo, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
Sometimes Our Shyness Ruins Potential Opportunities. Learn What Really Hides Behind It.
Dealing with Shyness
Picture the scene; you’ve walked into a networking event and you’re in a room full of people who have the potential to help you grow your business. This is a great opportunity to meet and mingle with like-minded individuals and spread the word about what you do, but there’s a problem – you find yourself standing at the edge of the room wanting to join in with the conversations going on around you, but somehow feeling too shy to get involved. Sound familiar? If this resonates with you, you’re not alone, and it’s realizing that others may be feeling the same way that holds the key to dealing with shyness.
It’s Not About You
There’s a great quote by former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt that helps to put things into perspective: “You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” You see, shyness is often considered an innate characteristic, a personality problem that you have, but here’s the thing, it’s not about you, it’s all about the assumptions you make about other people.
Let’s put this into context. You’re in a room full of entrepreneurs who all seem to be getting on like a house on fire. You see them as way more relaxed and confident than you, and you jump to the conclusion that they’re all much more established, experienced, and better connected than you. This is an assumption that makes you feel different from those around you, and it’s because you feel different (and not in a good way) that you feel shy.
See Similarities, Not Differences
So, how about dumping the assumptions? This might seem easier said than done if you’ve ever experienced the tongue-tying, face-reddening effects of shyness, but just imagine how it would feel to see the similarities between yourself and those around you rather than the differences. In the networking scenario, you’ve gone to the event for a reason – drop the assumptions and you’ll see that everyone else in the room has gone to the event for similar reasons, right? Others may appear more relaxed and confident than you, but everyone experiences moments of doubt in life. We’re all human, and no one is infallible, not even the most successful people in the room…
… Elon Musk
When you see the founder of PayPal, Tesla, and Space X up on stage wowing an audience with a presentation, you might assume he’s never had to deal with shyness, but you’d be wrong. Describing himself as an “introverted engineer”, he speaks openly about having to get over his fear of public speaking.
… Richard Branson
We know him as the loud and proud founder of Virgin Group, but Richard Branson grew up feeling so shy that he struggled to talk to people. Describing himself as a natural introvert, he says, “I had to train myself into becoming more of an extrovert.”
Everyone has issues, and everyone deals with insecurities at some point in life. Next time you feel shyness creeping over you, take a moment to consider the assumptions you’re making about the people around you: are they really so very different to you?
