How expectations could lead to the end of a relationship.
Posted on October 07, 2019 by DORA PREVOST, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
we should learn to Let go, to throw expectations and assumptions out the door.
When it comes to relationships, One has to release the hopes, wishes, and dreams that things will change by detaching from the ideas that we put in our mind. Get out of the fantasy world by not hooking into the thoughts of what could be. Keep your mind from running into the future. Remain open to all possibilities by staying in the present moment.
Should we go into a relationship with any expectations at all?
Not at all, we cannot expect other people to treat us as we would treat them. We cannot assume anything or force change upon someone who clearly demonstrates he or she is stuck in his or her own way. When what we expect to happen does not happen, we are disappointed and we suffer pain at some level. The greater the expectation, the greater the pain. Ironically, we are also likely to be unhappy even when our expectations ARE met! I would say, “If you can’t change the circumstances, change your perspective.”
What kind of expectations could you have of a relationship?
An ideal relationship does not involve expectations that are not implied in the relationship itself; in other words, partners in an affectionate relationships can expect love and support, partners in a physical relationship can expect a certain amount of sexual activity, and so on. The point is that these expectations should arise naturally, and should rarely be mentioned as such. If you feel you have to say the words, “I expected you to…” there’s something wrong.
Expect what you can, reach and be aware of the fact that sometimes life throws you a curve ball. Try to remain confident while maintaining positive aspirations; just remember not to make these aspirations so high that they are impractical or unreachable.
Acceptance is an amazing trait that needs to be actively worked toward. When things do not work out the way we had planned, it is much more beneficial to realize that is how life works rather than becoming frustrated at the situation. Have hope rather than expectations and you will tend not to be as disappointed.
what I can tell someone who is struggling with expectations is ; The more successfully we can lower our expectations of others, the more time we have to develop our personal sense of responsibility – and the more effort we put into living up to our personal responsibilities, the more we experience responsibility as joy and fulfillment. So, first Learn to love yourself.
Provide yourself with what you are yearning for (compliments, compassion, or encouragement). Only you know what you truly need.
Realize each moment you are being the best you at that time.Build self-confidence and strive to eliminate any doubts you have about yourself. When you feel shaky or alone, look in your eyes in the mirror and say, “I love you.” Nurture yourself. Feel the love you have inside of yourself.
