Finding The Way: An interpretation of personal development

Posted on July 28, 2019 by Olivier Legrand, One of Thousands of Executive Coaches on Noomii.

Many thought systems, particularly Asian philosophies, have promoted the idea that it is possible to reach higher levels of psychological functioning, whether morally, emotionally, or intellectually, by following a path of development which is often generically called “the Way”. The best known example of this is of course the Tao, which means “the Way” or “the Path” in Chinese. The Tao has many different interpretations in East Asian philosophies such as Taoism, Confucianism and Buddhism. Some are more focused on rituals, or metaphysics, or ethics; even within Taoism there are several different interpretations.

Western philosophies and religions have been less interested in metaphysical concepts of personal progress, being more focused on praxis (how to become better through your actions) and proximity to God (through prayer and faith). However Epicureanist and Stoicist philosophers in Ancient Greece did recommend changing your outlook on life through meditation in order to reach ataraxia, a state of freedom from trouble and desires.

An important characteristic of the Way is that it cannot be taught. The Tao is sometimes called the “nameless Tao”: which means that it cannot be expressed or understood in language. You can only understand the Way through personal experience. It is impossible to comprehend higher levels of development before you reach them yourself. Some elements of methods can of course be taught (meditation, helping others, self control…), but they give no guarantee of success. Let’s use an an analogy with being in love. You can explain what it means to be in love to someone who has never been in love: they can certainly understand the idea of being in love, they can understand the physical and emotional effects – but they will have no idea of the meaning or importance of love until they experience it themselves.

The diversity if human experience makes it difficult to precisely describe the nature of the Way. However, based on various sources, the Way can be tentatively characterized as follows:

1. Through personal development and experience, we can all reach higher levels of psychological functioning
2. Those higher levels cannot be taught or expressed in language, and need to be experienced personally
3. Reaching higher levels usually requires changing views and unlearning beliefs about the world
4. Progress involves improved interaction with others, including helping others and being helped by others
5. Progress along the Way leads to a more ethical and meaningful life

Kohlberg’s Stages of Moral Development can shed some light on the idea of personal development from a somewhat different perspective. According to Kohlberg, we interpret and solve moral dilemmas according to our stage of development. At the first stage, babies only look for their own pleasure, then children learn to obey rules, to cooperate, to be nice to others, and (for the most advanced) build their own concept of justice. Some people remain stuck at the earliest stages, while some reach the highest level (stage 6).

A summary of Kohlberg’s stages is shown below:

Stage 1: obedience and punishment. Do what you can get away with.
Stage 2: self interest. Do what you feel like.
Stage 3: social norms, good boy/good girl. Be nice to others.
Stage 4: law and order. Do your duty.
Stage 5: social contract. How can human society best function?
Stage 6: universal ethical conscience. Deeper moral considerations.

The trick is that someone operating at a certain level cannot possibly comprehend higher levels. This leads to all sorts of misunderstandings on moral issues. For example, people might say “how can you approve of taxation when you pay so much income tax?” (Stage 2 thinking, self interest) or “you are against the death penalty but if your family member was murdered, you’d want to execute the murderer” (arguably Stage 4 thinking, law and order). Stage 2 or 3 thinking is not wrong per se, but it ignores or denies the existence of later stage thinking, which recognizes that morals are universal and not dependent on your personal situation. It is important to note that the stage of development is not dependent on the ethical conclusion, but only on the arguments which were taken into account to reach the conclusion.

Tying it up all together, what does this mean for a coaching practice? In a path of personal development, progress can be experienced but not taught. One needs to be set in motion and challenged. Therefore, the role of a coach is to help the client to see things in a different perspective.

Olivier Legrand
olivier.legrand8@gmail.com