Unique Families, Unique Needs - Planning for a big event
Posted on June 23, 2019 by Barb Chapman Schutz, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
Just a short story from my past as it relates to those supporting loved ones with special/unique needs and the challenges faced for gatherings.
I remember when my son was younger (around 4 or 5 years old) and we had planned to go to a cottage where there would be a dinner event. My son struggled with his sensory needs more back then so just hopping in the car for a 7 hour drive to an unfamiliar cottage and spending one of the evenings at a function with a bunch of strangers was not something that was easy to plan for.
I wondered how he would behave and how he might react to the number of people crammed into the cottage for the dinner and what I would need to pack. I had to plan for a long car ride as well. Although it was not easy, I managed to gather the toys/social story tools, and sensory items needed. He did struggle a bit, but with lots of support and toys to keep him pre-occupied we made it though the evening with only one minor meltdown. I had also given everyone the heads up that he may need things to do or to go outside and that he may have to use his sensory items to help him through. He didn’t do well with the volume in the room either so he needed to have a quiet place to go. I had spent a long time planning and wished that there was someone to turn to to assist me with the chaos of planning and packing….
Now in my coaching practice, I assist families with these types of things…having support in understanding what we need to make it through an event with someone who may struggle with the noise, new surroundings, new people is so important as it not only helps the one with the needs, but you as the caregiver too. It takes the stress out of the event so that everyone can simply go and enjoy to the best of their abilities. I also understand the need to keep it short so I do not ask my clients to spend huge amounts of time with me on this…we get to the point and have them ready as soon as possible. My current package is simply 2 hours long with a 20 min follow up. Having gone through these types of situations myself has helped me see a clearer picture of what others need.
My children are teens now and when we go to events, we still plan for some space should it get loud, items to keep them busy and support from me when they feel overwhelmed. It took a lot of years but we are finally getting to a point that travelling to larger family events goes much smoother for all of us..
