Leading an Authentic Life

Posted on April 25, 2011 by Leia Gamache, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.

Authenticity is sometimes a slippery word that begs the question -who are we, really? Why is it that we resonate so deeply with very few people and wear the mask of impression with others?

Really, who are we?

We ask this as if it were some destination that we could reach by going backward or forward in time. Is that all we are? A mere snapshot in time that forces our conformity through the threat of being ‘seen’ as lacking in integrity, stability, maturity or substance?

Authenticity is freedom in its truest sense – freedom to change who we said we were last week; freedom to experience moments of doubt or even the existential angst that sometimes threatens our stability; freedom to revisit and feed our inner child (yes, even in the midst of clients and other professionals); and freedom to let go of some of the woundings that constitute that heavy and often opaque reality our fathers called substance.

The inner workings of this kind of authentic freedom was so deeply illustrated in “Man’s Search for Meaning” by Viktor Frankl. During his stay in a prisoner of war camp, Viktor discovered the one thing that could not be taken from us was “meaning”. Athough he could not change his outward circumstances, his participation in them was painted with the meaning that he freely chose.

It, ‘authenticity’, is about creating our own comprehensive meaning in life – and I’ll even go a step beyond to suggest that it is also *trusting ourselves to attract beings of like mind (or at least the mirrors necessary to get out of our own way). *

Look around you. *Who among you do you hide from *- within the roles they have given you or the roles that you have dressed in voluntarily? *Who among you inspires your courage to smile *when you feel joy, roar when you are angry, or weep when you are in pain?

Does living an authentic life come at a cost? You bet! The cost of Authenticity is not being all things to all people. It is trading quality for quantity in our relationships and it demands our diligent awareness in those moments when we are losing energy. It is about trading pain for pleasure, so we can gain both wisdom and youth.

Authenticity in our world takes a large dose of courage, after all, and a fair bit of cunning in the light (a teacher’s energy) -infinitely rewarding but not for the faint of heart.