WAKE UP CALL FOR HOUSEWIVES
Posted on January 25, 2019 by Ambika Goel, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
I dedicate this article to Housewives as I too started my married life as a housewife and I know all the fears n restrictions that a housewife faces
I have met many educated housewives who are struggling with an identity crisis. Becoming housewife was not their choice rather it was imposed on them and they could not resist enough back then. After marriage they got busy in taking care of their family because this was the only thing everyone expected from them to do. But the truth is this efficient housewife, obedient daughter in law, dedicated wife and loving mother is constantly cribbing and complaining inside her, for her present state. She blames her parents either for her early marriage or choosing an unsuitable partner for her or orthodox in-laws or not allowing her to study further. Or the attack is on husband for not understanding her and at times target is in-laws for the interference and restrictions they are putting on her. The reason behind this is she wants to fly like a free bird but finds herself cage. She wants to wear western clothes but blame is on in laws for not liking it. She wants to work but blames hubby for not allowing. She wants to join a hobby class and this time blame is on kids as its their tuition time. In a nutshell, whatever unpleasant happens in her life its all because of others. She has taken the responsibility of entire family on her shoulders but refuses to take her own.She has declared herself a victim of circumstances to the outer world and anyways blaming others for your misery and failures is the easiest way to escape.People do it when they don’t have enough courage and confidence to stand up for themselves but they don’t realize that this way they are escaping a better and happy life Here I have a question to all those housewives who fit themselves in the above description- Do you remember how many times you lied to your parents during your school/college days? Maybe for hiding a test paper or avoiding a PTM or going for movie with friends or hiding your love affair? Just go deep down and think more of such excuses you made and ask yourself- why didn’t you blame your parents that time and chose to remain a victim as you do today. You found your own solutions by hook or crook because you had that desire and determination to do or not to do something and you did whatever best you could do back then. Now remember the incidents where you duped your in-laws and husband or relatives. And the truth is you are doing it on everyday basis. Am I right? Remember you went out with your friends on pretext of your child’s PTM. You bought an expensive jewelry or dress and presented it as a gift by your parents. Remember, you planned your visit to your mom’s house when your sister in law was expected to come. You can find many more of such excuses that you play with everyday with ease. These were not just tricks but your way to handle the situations. I just want to remind you of your capabilities. You did all this because it makes you happy when you do what you like to. The fact is you want to live a life of your choice. Do you agree? If yes, my next question to you is- Did you ever make sincere efforts for it? Did you ever raise your voice when something wrong happened to you? Did you fight enough for your rights? Did you ever try to convince your folks with your point of view? Probably not! or maybe you tried but could not stand for long gave up in the middle because of some unknown fears like someone will shout at you or show his/her anger on you or they might create a scene in front of everyone etc. And this battle of yours like the ones in olden times resulted into surrender by the defeated King. Needless to say here defeated King is You. Like that defeated king you gave the command of your life in others hands and labelled yourself as poor and handicapped who can not lead her own life and is dependent on others mercy. Have you ever thought what you gained out of it? Neither you got harmony in your relationships nor did u get a life of your choice. Wake up girls!!! Its time to stop the blame game and take 100% responsibility of your life. For a moment, imagine how would your life have been like if you had beautiful bonding with your people and you were living your dream life. Does it seem difficult to imagine? If your answer is ‘yes’ then I have a good news for you. It might seem difficult at this point of time but its 100% achievable. The only thing which is required from your side is- your desire to make it happen. And here you might need a personal coach who can guide you the way to reach your dream life you crave for. People have this myth that one needs a coach when the person is sick or has some mental disorder and hence they hesitate to talk to the coach. Let me clear it here sickness is something which is handled by a therapist and mental disorder is taken care by doctors and psychiatrists. Coaching is a way of developing a clear and specific outcome through a healthy conversation. Its your wake up call girls !Its time to take action
Stop playing victim to the circumstances
Get out of your own way to your dream life
Remember: It is you- nobody else-who can change your destiny
You get this life only once. Don’t just drag it. Give it one more chance.
Talk to your coach. Invest in yourself.
Believe me it will be the best investment of your lifetime
