Should I Stay or Should I Go?

Posted on September 25, 2018 by Marvin Chambers, One of Thousands of Leadership Coaches on Noomii.

At least once a quarter, a leader calls me frustrated and ready to resign. Why such a drastic reaction you may ask? It usually centers around workplace relationships. Poor workplace relationships can result in feelings of dissatisfaction, unhappiness, hopelessness, depression, and other emotions.

Employees face conflict and often do not feel they have the support system to effectively manage the situation. So they turn to their coach - looking for support but hoping to get “permission” to just roll out and exit the situation. The temptation to seek greener pastures is hard to resist when you feel completely miserable and the thought of working with a colleague you are currently spending 8+ hours with a day makes you sick to your stomach.

Hey, I get it. Believe me… I have been there once or twice in my career. What I have learned is when you run, the problems seem to follow you - same foolishness different venue. Bob the backstabber is now named Mark. Martha the manipulator is now Rebecca. Now you are reminiscing about the good old days. Once I left a company because of a boss of questionable ethics and a high control orientation, just to get a voice mail from former colleagues pretending to be headhunters calling to inform me that is was OK to return. The boss from Hades left just four weeks after I resigned. Hmmm…. Quite a few stock options went out the window on that one.

This does not mean that you should never leave because of poor workplace relationships. I am just saying it is prudent to remove the emotion and make a thoughtful, well rounded decision. So how should I approach such a decision, you may ask?

I say go back to the basics… What attracted you to the organization in the first place? When you look at the company in its entirety, are you getting what you expected? Are you getting the experience that the employer promised?

I ask my clients to take a step back and assess their alignment with what the organization offers through an employer relationship gap analysis:

Delivery Gap: Does the company delivers on its commitments (i.e., commitments around values, work environment, relationships, effective processes, rewards, development, etc.)? Does the company have quality processes, systems, and tools that deliver on its promised experience?

Value Gap: Does the company ensure that what I give to the company and what I give back is fair? Am I getting as much as I am giving?

Enablement Gap: Do the investments the company makes in me enable me to contribute as much as I am capable of giving? Do I get the training, development, tools, coaching and support required for me to stretch to amazing performance?

Investment Gap: Do I find that what the company offers me is consistent with my needs and expectations? Does the company offer what I need?

Organization Fit Gap: Do I find the company is committed to creating the type of place that is attractive to me? Does what the company stand for (in words and actions) match my expectations of an employer?

What does this assessment reveal to you? Should you stay or should you go?

[NOTE: If you find an organization fit gap, you are probably pretty miserable. It’s time to go.]

The bottom line is if you find that the company ecosystem is not aligned with your values, expectations, and needs, removing yourself from the environment is more than a reaction to potential short term frustration and anxiety. You need to find an environment that unlocks your energy, passion and flow and allows you to be the best version of yourself.

Marvin Chambers is a Leadership/Life Coach and Ally. Marvin wants to help you fulfill your promise so that you can maximize your impact.

If you are interested in a complimentary coaching session, please contact Marvin at 1-866-434-0825 or email him at marvin@marvinchambers.com. Marvin Chambers Coaching is a Built To Last Solutions Company