Stuck in an Emotional Rut
Posted on February 24, 2018 by Victor Dull, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.
Sometimes we get stuck in a negative emotions. Here's an example of what I call upliftment work that I teach my clients..
Picture this. Your colleague calls his girlfriend and you overhear him making a lunch date. Suddenly you have this ugly, empty feeling in your heart. The thought “I’m lonely” pops into your mind. This thought pulls in another one, “I’m always stuck in a rut.” This train of thought gains momentum, “I don’t have anyone to share my life with. What’s wrong with me? I’ve been positive for so long. Why haven’t I met my love yet? I’m not getting anywhere.”
Then, you recall – “Oh, wait a second, my thoughts are making me feel worse and I need to put a stop to it. I know what I’ll do, I’ll talk myself up. I have this special skill for mental adjustments!” And … you spend your coffee break doing it.
By the time you go back to work you feel relief. It’s like a breath of fresh air because you don’t feel lonely anymore. You think, “Wow, just a few minutes ago I could replay over and over my agony and now I don’t feel that way anymore! I’m feeling uplifted and I truly believe my soulmate is somewhere near! This is getting interesting! I wonder where my love is? I have goosebumps thinking that my love could be around the corner. There are butterflies fluttering in my stomach and this feeling makes me happy with expectation. My love is here!”
Guess what? Below is an example of that mental adjustment that may turn your mood around.
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I’m lonely and this feels ugly.
~I am glad I am able to catch this thought and turn it around.
~What is the opposite to loneliness? Feeling filled with love, a sense of belonging.
~Why do I need anyone in order to feel filled with love?
~Why do I need to belong to anyone?
~Wouldn’t it be nice to feel love for myself from within?
~Wouldn’t it be nice to be filled with love for myself?
~Wouldn’t it be nice to fill in the emptiness in my heart with love for myself from within?
~Wouldn’t it be nice to feel unconditionally loved?
~Wouldn’t it be nice to satisfy my sense of belonging by belonging to myself?
~Wouldn’t it be nice to feel satisfied by having a sense of togetherness with myself, by myself?
~Me and myself. Together.
~Wouldn’t it be nice to love myself and be fully satisfied just by myself?
~What if I rather learn to be happy, meeting my Self?
~When I am full of love for my Self perhaps other people too, will feel my love and be attracted to it?
~This thought does feel good.
~I can notice the power in it and independence from other people.
~I love to feel powerful and in control of my feelings and life.
~It’s becoming easier for me to think of the love I want to generate for myself by myself.
~I can manage this.
~With time I’ll meet my love.
~And it feels good to know about my colleague meeting with his love, knowing that because of him I managed to feel good about myself.
~Breathe…
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Imagine, now instead of being frustrated, you feel glad for your colleague and for yourself for doing this work! You are sure that your soulmate is out there waiting for you
