How to Shift from Auto Pilot to Intentional Living

Posted on February 01, 2018 by Veronica Matthews, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

How to Shift from Auto Pilot to Intentional Living

Are you leading your life or is life leading you?

Remember that donut commercial from back in the day? A man dragging himself in and out of the house as he repeated the mantra that reminded him of his mission. (Click here to view if you’re not familiar.) I had my own mantra, but I was missing the mission. The alarm went off and I’d hit the snooze button – once, maybe twice or seven times. I’d begrudgingly roll out of bed and into the bathroom for my morning routine and tell myself it would be a great day. I’d commute to work; arrive at work; work; daydream a bit; work some more, watch the clock along the way and leave. Commute home; eat; relax a little; stay up way too late and get ready for bed. Sleep, then the routine starts all over again. Day, after day, after day. I was on autopilot, just going through the motions of life. Not much variety, not much living, only really responding to circumstances. Yes, there were some happy moments where I got to enjoy spending time with my family and friends, a nice dinner out or a movie, read a good book or take a relaxing trip. Those were nice, temporary indulgences, fleeting moments; but no lasting joy, no commitment to drive me or hold my interest, beyond paying the bills. So, I would ask myself, “Is this all there is to life? Did I earn a degree and these certifications and earn a decent salary for this?” What is this – living life, or as much as I permitted myself to live, in between the circumstances and crises? In my quest for passion and purpose, I discovered there is another way to be – Intentional Living.
Intentional living is when you do what you do with and on purpose. There’s a purpose, drive, and intention for everything. The first thing I learned was that there is no ‘there’ – there’s no finish line, there’s no arrival. If life is lived with conviction and purpose there is constant movement, re-invention, and transformation; therefore, you are consistently growing, changing, and evolving. That doesn’t mean there is no contentment, peace or happiness. It just means that you are living to be a higher version of yesterday’s you. When I awakened to the fact that I had been living my life on autopilot, I determined I wanted better for my life and I declared that I would live intentionally and not let life lead me around. I declared I would lead my life in a spirt-led, purposeful way, being intentional about how I moved through and showed up in life.

How to make the shift yourself

Be self-aware and practice good self-care
It appears that most of my articles touch on at least one, if not, both factors. Forgive me if I am starting to sound like a broken record; however, I am convinced both are critical, not only to intentional living but also, to a peaceful life in general. When you know who you are, how you show up in the world, what sources you so that you remain as full as possible to serve others, your foundation for intentional living has been established. Whenever you feel yourself veering off course, you can 9 times out of 10, look to your self-care (or lack thereof) and identify what adjustments could be made to course correct. Has your planning and preparation time fallen by the wayside, are you eating healthily, hydrating enough, getting sunshine and exercise, praying, meditating, and in general, doing things that make you smile and bring you joy? If not, once you adjust what’s out of alignment, your foundation is secured again, and you can get back on the journey to purposeful living.

Know Your Why, Create a Vision and Pursue It
Like the question of is this all there is; for what are we working every day? What is your why in service of – what is the bigger picture and your why for leaving the comforts of your residence every day to go to work? When you know your purpose, then create a vision of what it looks like with you fulfilling that purpose. Identify what accomplishments, feelings, sensations and energy are you present to in this vision. Give definition to your why for pursuing the vision and within that vision, create smaller milestones along the journey of fulfillment. If you haven’t yet uncovered your purpose, defined your vision and set your smaller milestones, take some time to sit with it and consider getting support to help you find the answers.

Plan and Prepare
This covers so many areas including your daily routines and setting priorities for the day, week, month, quarter and year. It’s been said, a dream without a plan is just a wish. Take some time and figure out what your goals and dreams are. What is the thing, if you achieved it, would push your life forward in an amazing way and allow you to be complete? What would you do for others, in service, that would bring you joy and contentment? When you figure out the big picture, then you have a purpose and vision for your life. Then you can plan out what to do daily, weekly, monthly, etc., that will fulfill on those goals and be intentional about the outcome you desire. Trust me, I’ve gone through life wishing each day would turn out to be a great day, but when I started planning and preparing for the day, week, month, etc., I saw how being intentional about the big things in life, helped the small things turn out better through small actions. When you know your big why, your actions, thoughts and the words you speak are in integrity and aligned with the ultimate goals and plans for your life and you are seeing your dreams come to pass by following through on those smaller daily commitments.

Get support and accountability
We were not meant to live our lives in seclusion. I learned the difference between being private and not reaching out for support because I was judging myself or afraid of what someone would think about me for asking for support. Once I came to realize that the people that genuinely love me, want the best for me and are willing to help me in any way they possibly can, I was able to release myself from my self-judgment of appearing weak. Support can show up in many ways, from simply sharing with a close friend what you have declared or intend to do so that they can help hold you accountable, to seeking a therapist for the more serious matters of healing, and a plethora of ways in between these two spectrums. Identify what support you want and from whom you want it, and ask. Making a request for support is not as hard as we make it up in our minds that it will be. When you relax into the idea of not living your life on an ‘island of one’ and invite people into your life to love and support you, you’d be surprised at how through that, you are ultimately, loving and supporting yourself to live with purpose and intention. Typically, support is a two-way street, as you receive support from others, you quite naturally reciprocate by supporting others. It could show up as immediately reciprocal to those that support you or it could be through a circle of support. That leads me to the next point of giving to live a life of purpose.

Give and Serve
Autopilot oftentimes has us living an internal life, focusing on how the circumstances of life and daily living are impacting us as individuals and our immediate family. Autopilot tends to keep us in a box, inside our own comfort zone doing what matters to us and concerns those closest to us. Giving of ourselves and serving others, however, takes the attention off us, gets us out of our head and puts us in a space of concern, care and responsibility for others and their needs. Whether it’s volunteering at a food pantry, taking a neighbor to the doctor, assisting with the youth ministry, or keeping company with the residents of a nursing home, when you give and serve with no expectation of anything in return, you’re living intentionally and with purpose – the purpose to give of yourself and to be used for a higher good. Figure out an area of service that is in line with your purpose and larger vision, so your actions are in service of you, your purpose and others simultaneously.
When you awaken to the realization that you have been living life on autopilot and want to take control of the wheel yourself, developing practices that will lead you closer to intentional living is where to begin. Imagine what your life would be like if you practiced Intentional Living and declare from there how your life will be different and fulfill. It starts with the choice. From choice, learn who you are and how to fill your cup. Then learn your purpose and how you were intended to bless the universe. Armed with a knowledge of self, self-care and your purpose, you can then plan your days and set small milestones that fulfill your larger goals. Then, by giving back and serving others, you are also being intentional and will find yourself more fulfilled.

Hear me when I say, autopilot is not wrong and intentional living is not right; I would like to point out that there is a choice. You get to choose. If you’d like to live with a routine that provides comfort and accomplishment for you; do just that if it serves your best interests. If you like to find ways to infuse joy and purpose into your life; that too is fine, if it serves you. Whichever way you choose to be and do; be and do that on your own terms.

One final note, intentional living is a journey and a process. It doesn’t happen overnight. Life could possibly get in the way to throw you off course. Be patient with yourself, show compassion for yourself and don’t be afraid to experiment until you find what works for you. If you’d like support around shifting your way of being and doing, there’s a Coach out there available to support you. I happen to know quite a few fantastic Coaches and can make a referral for you.