Are You Comfortably Uncomfortable? Tips to Help You Move Forward
Posted on April 07, 2017 by Tracy Baranauskas, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
Do you want to make a change, but continue to stay in your unhappy place because it is comfortably familiar? Here are some tips to move you forward.
Is there something in your life that you would like to change: your job, your career path, a relationship, your health – but instead you continue to stay in your unhappy place because it has become familiar? For many of us, it is not unusual to remain “comfortably uncomfortable” due to the fear of uncertainty. We think, “Yes, I’m not happy in this situation but at least I know how to cope here. What if I make a change and it’s worse?” Yikes! This is no way to live the life you were given!
If this is you, then here are some tips to help you begin to make a shift towards change:
1. Work on your confidence: In order to make a change, you must believe in yourself. If you have been struggling in a major area of your life, your confidence may be lacking. The good news is, confidence is like a muscle and it will grow with each step forward you take. One terrific exercise you can start with is to make a list of all the accomplishments you have made in your lifetime. Beginning with your childhood until present time, make a very comprehensive list. No achievement is too small to include. From learning to ride a bike, to moving out on your own, to landing your first “real” job – these were all accomplishments that propelled you out of your comfort zone. When you remember past achievements, it reminds you who you are, and builds up your confidence “muscle”!
2. Feel the fear and do it anyways: If you haven’t read this book by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D., then please pick up a copy. In “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyways”, Dr. Jeffers explains that fear is our natural reaction to change (the unknown). She recommends that instead of fighting the fear, we accept it as natural, feel it and move forward anyway. She encourages us to remember we have handled every difficult situation we have encountered in our lives thus far, and so we can have faith that we will do the same in the future. Simple but very powerful advice!
3. Take action: Even one small step forward will help to increase your momentum. Often when we look at the big picture, it can feel overwhelming and immobilize us with fear. This is when we get “stuck”. It is important that you break up your large goals into small, manageable steps that feel very doable. For instance, if your goal is to start a business, you may dream about it for many years but fail to get started because it seems so overwhelming. You may not even know where to begin. If this is the case, then your first step might be: talk with three entrepreneurs and ask them how they started their businesses. You could do that, right? Just think about how that can get you excited about moving forward to the next step, and so on!
4. Hire a coach: It is hard for many of us to hold ourselves accountable, especially when fear and uncertainty are in play. If you are someone who responds well to outside accountability, then working with a coach can be your ticket to success. In addition, a coach will help you clarify your goals when you feel overwhelmed, and help you to keep your “eyes on the prize” along the way. Finally, the support and encouragement of a coach will help turn the change process from something that scares you into an experience that is exciting and fills you with joy!
