Why Bullshit Motivational Programs Won't Work
Posted on March 30, 2017 by Vance Larson, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.
Learn the biggest reason why self help programs and coaches won't work.
I spent 3 decades working in mental health in various capacities and there is one truth that I have learned over those decades. It doesn’t matter what self help program, the cost, the coach or belief system is, if you’re not committed to calling yourself out on your own bullshit, it simply won’t work. Attitude, intention and honesty are the key to moving forward.
I have seen many clients go through these self help programs and retreats. I have watched them spend literally hundreds of thousands of dollars, and in two to three months they are right back where they started…..if they’re lucky. I say lucky because when their new outlook on life doesn’t make them exempt from trying times, they end up feeling worse off then when they started. They feel a sense of failure because the initial high doesn’t last. And who is to blame? If you ask me, in many cases it is the professional.
Just the other night I was speaking to a potential client who needed relationship coaching. During his consultation I told him that I could realistically help him with maybe 70% of his goals. That I would be more than happy to take his money off his hands, but in the spirit of best practices, I needed to inform him that he/they would fair better seeing a marriage counselor. {Some would say I suck at sales. I would said you suck at life. Just kidding.} I just believe in complete transparency. We need to be honest with our clients that if they are not fully committed to the process, that they should save their money until they are.
I can recall working in some of the worst addiction treatment centers, and some clients, against all odds did exceedingly well. Fast forward to when I ran a very upscale treatment center where the clients would receive massage, personal chef and every other amenity under the sun, and would relapse over and over again. I’m talking about working with high profile people { CEO’s, professional athletes and celebrities}. Why did the down and out client often shine while the professional didn’t? Because they were out of options. They had nothing left but intention. While in many cases the professional just moved onto the next treatment center.
So yes, I routinely turn away clients. I think this comes with years of experience. When I was younger I would often take those clients I turn away now. With good intentions, I wanted to help them. Years later I realize that sometime good intentions can set a client back. So as we ask our clients to be honest with themselves, we as providers must be honest with ourselves as well. Because in the end, it is attitude, intention and honesty that will get your clients result, and not some bullshit motivational program.
While we can provide support, accountability and action items, its all wasted on a client who is not honest with themselves.
