A Growth Mindset: stress, unhappiness & finding yourself
Posted on November 07, 2016 by Dawn Zivanovich, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned so as to have the life we have waiting for us" by Joseph Campbell
What is your life’s purpose? Eventually, many of us begin to wonder what we are doing on this earth? Millennials often come to a point in their lives where they ask this question. After doing what they are supposed to do: planning and completing their education, working hard and doing the right things, they sometimes find they are stuck in a job they dislike or they can’t find one at all. They don’t feel fulfilled or motivated. They start to feel lost, exhausted, stressed and overwhelmed. They begin to question what it’s all about. Life’s too short to feel this unhappy.
You’re right! As a coach I think everyone is entitled to a happy, successful and fulfilling life with purpose. You are here for a very specific reason! But, how are you supposed to figure it out?
Well, you can talk to family and friends but they are usually biased in one way or another. Family members especially might be concerned that you might make a decision that could affect your life forever. However, life can’t just be about working, sleeping, eating and chores and doing this day after day. It’s hard to believe we are here to toil, be miserable and then die eventually.
How does a coach help you find yourself and help you figure out what to do? A coach asks very specific purposeful questions. They use strategies and tools that friends and family might not think of. They help you get in touch with those parts of you that feel excited and energized. And then they support you with finding direction and setting goals and action plans.
Sounds easy but first of all, it takes commitment to yourself, to your happiness and a “growth mindset” to the process of coaching. Your coach nurtures personal growth by helping you to look at different angles and perspectives on life. He or she will encourage you to think big, be creative and view the world through a variety of lenses. It might take some digging and some painful awareness to get to what’s waiting for you.
What have I learned? Maybe 25% of teens and young adults, millennials, know exactly what they want to do and they go and do it and love their chosen careers. If you follow what you love to do, and what energizes you, naturally, the right doors seem to open up. But most teens and young adults do what they are supposed to do according to parents and teachers. And it might not be the right path. It can lead to feeling disillusioned with life and feeling stressed and unhappy. Unfortunately, this can lead to unhealthy habits, addictions or even physical or mental illness if it continues for a long period of time.
You may have taken some detours and wandered off into other areas of life that aren’t making you happy. As your coach, I help bring you back to to your dreams and remind you of your personal strengths and accomplishments. Your well being and your agenda is the priority!
Where should you start. Sometimes you have to be willing to let go of what you think should be happening in order for life to show us various other paths. It’s up to you to choose which path to take.
Here’s a sample of some powerful questions to help you get started: What excites me? If money were no object, what would I be doing? What would I do if I didn’t care what other people thought of me? What did I dream of doing when I was a child? What unique abilities, strengths and skills do I have?
You may need to build skills and knowledge but with the right people supporting you, and the belief that it is possible, you may just find yourself and your purpose in life. Then who knows where you will go and what you will accomplish? One thing is certain: you will feel better!
