What triggers you?

Posted on September 15, 2016 by Nora Paxton, One of Thousands of Executive Coaches on Noomii.

“Don’t let people get to you. They can’t pull the trigger if you don’t hand them the gun.”. We all have emotional triggers. You know the feeling when someone says something that might not be a big deal to someone else, but can impact you for the rest of the day? Or something that occurred, making you react, and then your brain finds a reason that seems to justify your behavior even if the reason makes no sense. You find yourself un-centered and feeling anxious, depressed, angry, guilty or ashamed. Does this sound familiar? It is not easy to find what exactly triggers you, but understanding them help us cure and better manage our emotional response. Triggers are connection between the conscious mind and our buried childhood memories. As adults we become triggered by experiences that are reminiscent of these memories. The first step to recovery is take responsibility for your behavior. Empower yourself instead of acting as a victim. Second, is to recognize the emotional reaction as soon as it starts to appear in your body. Third, find the emotional triggers and how does it translate in your mind. For example if the emotional triggers is “being understood”, it can translate into a feeling of being valued. Fourth is learning how to change your emotional state. You can do it by clearing your mind of all thoughts, center yourself or practice mindfulness, or maybe choose a word that represents how you want to feel when it happens, breath in the word and allow yourself to feel the change. Be very honest with yourself about your triggers. Stop trying to manage your emotions, instead be more kind with yourself and choose to feel different when an emotion shows up. This honesty is what will eventually heal them and gain your emotional freedom. So what are your triggers?