Dating Advice For Men: The Third Date
Posted on July 20, 2016 by Betty Russell BCC, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.
The extra pressure that you may feel because of the third date myth (it is not a rule!) can actually spoil the fun and romance of the date.
Dating Advice for Men: The Third Date
Congratulations, she accepted your offer for a third date! This clearly shows she enjoys your company, is attracted to you and wants to explore where this relationship is heading.
The first date nervousness is behind you. You won’t be as unsure about where to go, how to act or what to say, since you know one another a little better by now. You have established yourself as a thoughtful, chivalrous gentleman, and you know she likes what she sees. After all, she said yes to a second and a third date!
On the second date you got to know each other better. You opened up about yourselves, and relaxed a little. And if you’ve gotten to this point, the question of attraction is answered, too. Phew! So it’s time for #3.
Plan a long third date. By now you’ve had two dates and have paid attention to what she has told you about her likes and dislikes. It should be a little easier to come up with someplace you will both enjoy. You might take a trip to a beautiful park followed by dinner. Or you could go for a long drive away from the city and spend an afternoon picnicking in a romantic spot. Whatever you choose to do on your third date, try to spend all day with each other.
If you do, you won’t regret it. Third dates are special. By now you will definitely be more comfortable with each other, so make the most of the easiness between you to have a more intimate conversation. Share your dreams, aspirations and fears with her and encourage her to do the same. At this point, think of your time together as an opportunity to enter one another’s lives a little more. And as I mentioned in my blog for the second date,{link second blog} do not bring up anything negative, such as past relationships or controversial subjects – it is too early for those conversations. If talking about your dreams and aspirations with her feels good, it is likely that your relationship will last a long time.
When it comes to third date etiquette for men, being chivalrous is still key, as always. Remember to be polite, hold doors open for her, give her a sincere compliment about her appearance and pay the tab. As a gentleman, you should assume no sex on the third date, despite the infamous “third date rule” that implies that the relationship must become physically intimate at this point. One of the perils of this myth is that it can cause a lot of pressure for both of you. You may feel that you have to make a move for the sake of all mankind. She may be worried about being intimate before she is ready and that saying no will jeopardize the relationship. The extra pressure that you may feel because of the third date myth (it is not a rule!) can actually spoil the fun and romance of the date. It’s not the number of dates that matter, it is the depth of feeling that you have for one another that should determine if you are ready for sex or not. Some people share an amazing chemistry very early on while for others it may take months to gradually warm towards passion.
So, whether you have sex on the third date or the seventh date, or the seventeenth date should depend on how you feel about the whole relationship. Forgoing the third date myth could also save you a lot of heartache. Sometimes getting involved in a sexual relationship, at a time when you still don’t know her very well, can complicate the situation even more if you later realize you are not an ideal match. It’s true you are more comfortable now with one another, but, hey, it’s only been three dates. Go easy on yourself. So if either of you is not ready, it would be better to enjoy the time you spend together rather than thinking about how the third date “should” end in bed. Let intimacy evolve at its own pace.
That being said, the third date is still one where you will likely kiss when you meet. If you’ve kissed already and share a great chemistry, it’s completely acceptable to kiss each other upon meeting. Go ahead and tell her how great she looks and something you genuinely like about her. After all, this is your third date and there is certainly an attraction that keeps you coming back for more.
So open the car door for her, hop in and off you go on a wonderful date to unravel the mystery of where your relationship is heading. This will be the best date yet!
Click here to find out more and get your complimentary coaching session with me now!
