5 Benefits of Stress

Posted on May 09, 2016 by Elizabeth Bruce, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

What is stress, really?

When was the last time you went a single day without hearing the word stress? Stress has been a major buzzword for a few decades now. You would think that something with so many negative connotations would not have such enduring popularity.

It’s on everyone’s lips constantly, there are books about it, classes to cure it, whole industries dedicated to eradicating it. Funny thing though, stress is mostly self-inflicted. In fact, stress has become a badge of honor.

Being stressed had become synonymous with being busy and important, being valued and having needed skills. Think about it. When we talk about being stressed, we’re really saying everyone wants a piece of us. At work, at home, at play. To be stressed is a humble brag, it’s a way of saying you have a valuable and productive life and that you are in demand.

But let’s step back for a minute and think. What are we really saying when we say we’re stressed? The real message is that we are stretching beyond our capabilities and we are afraid we cannot meet expectations. Stay with me here.

If we felt perfectly capable of performing our work tasks, why would work stress us out? Stress is about uncertainty. If we know for a fact that everything is under control and that we have the ability to deliver, what would there be to stress about?

If we were perfectly in sync with our partners and mates, had a good idea of where we were headed and what we were about, and were certain of their loyalty, love and support, why would we be stressed?

If we weren’t being squeezed in the deadly clutches of FOMO (fear of missing out), there would be no desperate need to keep up with our friends and acquaintances and no need for stress.
Stress, if you really stop and analyze it, is fear-based thinking.

Common causes of stress?

Not all stress is bad stress. There are two types of stress. Good stress happens when you are aligned with your purpose. It is the butterflies in your stomach as you prepare to do something you never thought you would. As you stretch yourself beyond the boundaries you thought possible. It happens as you are propelled forward and learning new things about yourself, your desires and abilities.

Bad stress is destructive. It is the sense of constantly doing things you would rather not do. It is the resentment you feel toward people and situations that you would not normally choose. It is a sense of being stuck in place or being the unstoppable force trying to shift the immovable object.

The difference between the two is very clear and you know it when you feel it. Good stress is about growth and possibilities. Bad stress is about being lost and stuck.

Some common causes of everyday stress include
1. Social media with the fear of missing out and the relentless need to keep up or be left behind.
2. Multitasking which usually means you are doing many things not very well.
3. Commuting which is self-explanatory.
4. Relationships with all their inherent uncertainty.

Some lesser known and surprising causes of stress include
1. Resentment of others who we believe have mistreated or offended us and gotten away with it.
2. Self talk; we are constantly having conversations with ourselves but we are so accustomed to them that many of us are not even aware of them anymore. When we constantly criticize ourselves or doubt our abilities we become uncertain and this causes stress.
3. Jealousy. When we compare ourselves to others and find ourselves lacking.
4. Unrealistic expectations. When we expect others to act in ways that they fail to live up to or we expect situations to unfold in ways they don’t, we become stressed.

5 Benefits of Stress

1. If you’re experiencing good stress (also called eustress), it means you’re doing what you love, you feel fulfilled, you’re creating something worthwhile and you are aligned with your core values.
2. Good stress is also a source of motivation. It occurs when you push your boundaries and stretch beyond your current capabilities to become a better version of yourself.
3. Bad stress can be beneficial as an indicator that you are off track. It is a sign that you are moving away from what you really desire.
4. Stress in relationships is an alarm bell. It is a sign that your relationships require more quality time and your attention. It is a wake up call.
5. Acute stress, which occurs in short, temporary spurts, acts like a strength trainer for the body. It boosts the immune system, improves brain function, and makes you better able to handle more extended periods of stress with less negative impact.

How to maximize the benefits of stress
In order to benefit from stress and mitigate its negative effects, try the following:

1. Identify and eliminate as many areas of bad stress as possible. It may seem like an overwhelming task so the next time you find yourself feeling negative stress, think about one small action you might take to alleviate or eliminate your stress.
For example, if you hate your commute, is it possible to change your route or mode of transportation? Perhaps you can change what you do while commuting – listen to audiobooks or music or comedy.
If your relationship is stressed, ask yourself, what can you do, without expecting anything in return, to reduce the stress. What is the other person really asking for from you – that you listen to them actively? That you hear and respect their point of view (even if you don’t agree), that you spend more time with them? Or give them a sense of certainty by showing your commitment in some way?
If you are uncertain in any area of your life and it is causing you stress, take steps to reduce the uncertainty or learn to live with the uncertainty.
It is important to remember that small steps create big changes. Sometimes the most insurmountable difficulty can be overcome by beginning with a small act.

2. Actively seek opportunities to cultivate good stress. You can do this by opening yourself to new people and experiences. You can delve more deeply into one or two subjects you find interesting. Try to do some things you’ve never done before. Start with the least intimidating and work from there.

3. Try to be more self aware. Listen to the messages that your stress is sending. Understand what it is telling us about how we live our lives.