The Promise of Tragedy
Posted on December 02, 2015 by Jerod Rinkus, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
We cannot avoid tragedy, but it doesn't have to rule us.
“In every life, no matter how full or empty one’s purse, there is tragedy. It is the one promise life always fulfills. Thus, happiness is a gift, and the trick is not to expect it but to delight in it when it comes, and to add to other people’s store of it.” ~Charles Dickens, Nicholas Nickleby
I am a big fan of Dickens, as my wife will tell you. In all of his stories, there is that element of the tragic, and perhaps that is why I love his works. I always manage to find some spiritual truth in everything he writes about.
Why do we go thru life expecting that nothing bad will ever happen? Bad things do and will happen! No amount of positive thinking will prevent them entirely.
But there is a flip side to this……. Life is full of great joy! So much joy is contained in this Great Creation, that sometimes I struggle to find the logic for feeling sorrow at all. And yet, I have my own sorrows.
I often ask Why. Why should it be that this infant is dying and I am called to their incubator by grieving parents to give them final ceremonies? Why is it that our loved ones must all part with us eventually, often at unexpected times? Why do many of us struggle to make ends meet year after year, despite all of our education and ability?
I cannot give you the answer to this. I don’t know the answer. But what I do know is that happiness is indeed a state of mind. When life in unkind to us, we still have the ability to be kind to ourselves. We choose to live in sorrow or joy.
A wise friend of mine once told me that it isn’t what happens to you in life that matters, it’s how you handle it! I tend to agree. When it seems like I can’t get a break, no matter how hard I try, I try and look for the joy that is all around me. I endeavor to he happy for the sake of being happy.
That is not to say that we should pretend to be happy when we are in sorrow. Sometimes we need to mourn, even need to rage a little. But should we let our lives revolves around grief and rage? No, I would rather feel the pain and move past it, then look around and smile at all the wonderful things around me.
Unfortunately, this practice ticks people off. No, seriously, it does. Misery loves company, and if someone else wants your company and you are too busy being happy, it can really get in their craw. But then, they just might need to feel that way for a while, in order that they night process their experiences and move past them., or so we can hope.
So, I promise you that tragic things will happen in your lives. But how do you handle them? Do you focus on those things that cause you sorrow, or on those things that bring you joy? Do you delight in the joy when it comes?
Let’s all spend some time being ridiculously happy :-)
Awen.