Finding the secret to happiness, peace and joy in your life

Posted on November 13, 2015 by Bill Conley, One of Thousands of Family Coaches on Noomii.

Finding the secret to happiness, peace and joy in your life
Shhhhhhh, would you like to know a secret? The secret to finding true peace, love, joy and happiness? The secret to sustaining happiness in your life? The secret to living a life free of fear, worry, guilt, doubt, shame, negativity, bitterness, revenge and tension? Each of us is capable and deserving of finding and sustaining happiness in our life. The secret to finding happiness lies within each of us and is available for you to experience each and every day.
After years of struggling to identify what in my life makes me happy, I stumbled upon the answer in the most unusual way. I was involved in an exercise during a conference I was attending that required each participant to go out into the community and randomly assist people in acts of kindness that they least expected. The lesson I learned that day and which has stuck with me and helps direct me each and every day is this. I concluded for me that I need to live a life outside of me, a life focused on loving and serving others and a life that was guided by truth and void of lying to myself and others.
Most of us have heard the phrase, “pay it forward”. I have found that by changing what I will refer to as “moments in another person’s life”, I can change or alter my own life’s perspective to one in which I find love, peace and joy, by serving others unconditionally and without expectation of receiving anything in return.
I began living my life in part based on two additional principles that I actively, consciously and thoughtfully employed throughout my day. First, I made a conscious effort to not make things about me, my needs, wants and desires, my goals and ambitions. Second, I look for ways each and every day to love and serve others, known or unknown to me without ever expecting to receive anything in return. I have found that by changing or altering the “moment” in another person’s life, thrilling and rewarding, satisfying and consistent with my daily goal to make a difference in another person’s life for the better.
It can be as simple as a smile to someone you sense is having a hard day, or engaging another person in conversation and making the conversation about them, their needs, wants, goals and desires. When we are actively listening to others, questioning them about what is going on in their world, we begin to appreciate that which we have been so generously given. When I live my life that is not all about me, it allows me to view life from the other person’s perspective. When I am observing others and questioning myself, how can I help this person in the moment, I am freed to love and serve them in a way they least expect it.
When I love and serve others without ever expecting to receive anything in return, I open myself to experiencing true love, joy, peace and happiness. We all know what it feels like when we do a kind act for another person. How warm we feel inside. Just imagine living each and every day of your life with that perspective. When we continually strive and look for ways to alter the “moments” in another person’s life, they will take notice and want to surround themselves with your love.
People want to be noticed, they want to know that someone cares about them, they want to know that they fit in and are accepted and they want to know that they are appreciated, loved, respected, trusted and that they matter. People want to know that there are others who think about them and what makes them happy. A simple and random act of kindness to another person brings to me an overwhelming feeling of happiness and joy. I just love to see a smile on another person’s face when I have just spent a moment, thinking about them, caring about them or acting to make their day a little happier. Seeing this smile, a sign of appreciation for my act of kindness creates within me a feeling of satisfaction that I have enriched the life of another person which in turn enriches my life and brings me great happiness.
When two people are sharing a “moment” of happiness and joy together, all their troubles, their worries, fears and insecurities seem to just melt away, if even for just a moment.
By living a life where you are consistently looking for ways to change the life of others, we allow ourselves to abandon our “stuff” that may bring us down and allow us to wallow in self-pity and that binds us to living a life of negativity. When did living a life of negativity ever gets you anywhere close to living a life of happiness?
We all deserve a life where we are loved, appreciated, trusted, respected, accepted for who we are and not for who we are not, treasured, thought of on a regular basis and admired. In order to live that life, we must FIRST give away that which we desire. In giving away that which we desire FIRST, we will in return receive back the love, peace, happiness and joy we deserve.
Remember…
It is not about you.
Live a life of love and service to others.
Look for ways to change a moment in another person’s life throughout the day.
Giveaway FIRST an attribute you would like to receive.
NEVER expect anything in return for your random act of kindness.
Live a life of gratitude.
Happiness lies within each of us and is just waiting for you to grab hold of it. The secret to happiness is to bring happiness into the life of others FIRST.