5 Tips for Mending Difficult Relationships
Posted on October 20, 2015 by Mary Comm, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.
Relationships are hard, but they don't have to stay that way! Here are 5 things you can do to make difficult relationships better.
Relationships can be hard. Sometimes the very places you feel the strongest, and most equipped are the ones that seem to flare up the most frequently. That has been the case for me this past week.
Yes, I’m a relationship coach. And no, my relationships are not perfect! I have relationship difficulties the same as everyone else.
The fact that I still have relationship struggles means I am still learning and growing in my relationships and in what makes them healthy. Of course, because none of us is perfect we will always have room for growth and improvement! With that said, here are a few tips for getting through those rocky relationship issues:
1. Examine yourself. Ask yourself where you may possibly have made a mistake in the relationship. Did I communicate clearly? Did I listen well to the other person? Did I forget to add something that was important to the conversation? Could I have done it better? If so, how? Take responsibility for your words, actions, etc. Admitting you’ve made a mistake is a beautiful thing; it in no way diminishes who you are.
2. Be s-l-o-w to anger. This principle applies both in your perspective toward the other person AND yourself. If you’re like me, you tend to be harder on yourself than others are–an area in which I have grown tremendously lately! But of course it also applies to the other person. Anger doesn’t accomplish anything good. So instead of getting angry, take a deep breath and ask strive for clarity, wisdom, discernment, and humility as you work to remedy the situation.
3. Apologize and make it right. You can’t make everything okay, but you can do what you can do. You won’t be able to make it right with everyone, but you can do your part to that end. Sincerely apologize and, if necessary, ask the other person how you can make things right again.
4. Give it time. Give the other person time to process. Not everyone processes things at a breakneck speed! Give them the time and space to reason things out for themselves without pressuring them to get in line with your thinking. Practice patience!
5. Let it go. If you’ve done everything you can do to own your stuff, to apologize and make it right, sometimes all you can do at that point is to let it go. It may take a long time or that relationship may never be restored, but at least you will know you did what was in your power to do. Remember, as long as there is life, there is hope for restoring broken relationships.
Relationships matter because people matter. So whenever you are facing difficulties in your relationships, do the right thing, and as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
(Copyright Mary Comm, 2015. All rights reserved.)