Do You See What They See? (Part 3)

Posted on July 09, 2015 by Reginald Jackson Sr, One of Thousands of Executive Coaches on Noomii.

You may be familiar with the phrase, ‘Curiosity killed the cat’. Plainly put, this phrase references paying too much attention to the affairs of others. The same can be said regarding the perceived obsession our society has with the activities of friends, family, the media, politicians, etc. Imagine what could be discovered by shifting the focus inwardly; lending the same level of curiosity to ourselves. If you transferred the focus of your curiosity, what could you learn? Have you ever wondered why people act/respond a certain way? Can you think of questions you have posed to others, or vice versa? A few that come to mind are ‘What were you thinking?’ or ‘Why would you do something like that’?

A dear friend, who is also an amazing Coach once said, she can always tell when smart people “go dumb”. During the course of conversation, the telltale sign is when they respond with, “I don’t know”. While it’s possible the answer is unknown, more times than not the question is preferred to be left unanswered. It’s possible they are ashamed of the truth, or believe their response will be judged, or laughed at. In actuality, the response is closer to, ‘I don’t (want you to) know’. Better yet, if the truth is preferred to be left a mystery [to themselves], the response could even mean, ‘I don’t (want to) know’. Could it be the truth is too painful to admit? If so, this may very well be one of the reasons for the outward curiosity [instead]. If you choose to take the path toward self-discovery, it requires a certain level of inquiry. Although it’s not a journey for the faint of heart, it can be an exciting one that’s sure to open your eyes. It’s very possible you will eventually be quite pleased with the view! So how do you get there? A good place to start is with right where you are, and take nothing for granted.

Have you ever looked at the calendar and wondered where the month went? Several days have gone by and you can’t account for them! There is a misnomer that exists where we believe it’s because we’ve been so busy or so focused, we lost track of time. Another example is people who “can’t wait” for things to happen. Things like the weekend, a party, the ‘big game’, etc. By doing so, they create so much velocity during the week, they tend to miss a large portion of what goes on in their life! They’re so focused/fixated on a particular day or event, they are more likely to ignore much of what takes place leading up to that anticipated date. When this happens, they actually disconnect a part of themselves and fail to be fully present.

So how do you connect and get fully present? The first thing to do is slow down!

Imagine what goes on in the mind of a child. They manage to find things we didn’t realize were there. Everything is a new discovery! Look around you. What do you see [right now] you didn’t see before? How about you? Try taking a few minutes out of your day and do your best to discover something “new” about yourself. Do you clench your teeth, tighten you fist(s)? Are you scowling or frowning? If you find yourself doing any of these things, what was on your mind at the time? Chances are, you weren’t aware those things were going on. Guess what? Other people do!

Of course there are far more flattering observations to make as well. Do people smile at you on the elevator or on the street? Are you greeted with a cheerful word at the store or walking into the office? There’s a reason for that too. Could it be you? This is yet another opportunity for curiosity.

Now that you are armed with a new appreciation for creating awareness through curiosity, the next thing to do is take some notes and reflect on what you’ve discovered about yourself. In a few short weeks, you will be well on your way to creating a completely different point of view; just in time for Part 4!