How to create a balanced life: 10 tips to help you find balance with a coach

Posted on June 24, 2015 by Antony Martiniani, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

Is It All In The Stars?
Cancer my sign is the crab June 21stJuly 20th
Such people are inclined to be easily hurt, by the slights of others.
These are very complex people, sometimes appearing extremely strong and at other times to be as vulnerable as a little child.

These people are extremely good at accumulating things; indeed, they can be very unwilling to throw anything away, even relationships that have passed their use-by date.
They’re generally over-anxious with financial matters, and make great efforts to gather much money; as a rule, they have unusual ups and downs in their early life and so they are compelled to work to keep ahead, but once they get on their feet they stay there.
If channeled in the right direction, their enormous sensitivity can become a great source of strength.
Once they overcome their touchiness and are able to master their turbulent emotions, their intellect and imagination enable them to become very success in almost anything they undertake.
So how do these people find balance, to be totally honest I’m not sure how much my “signage” plays into my desire to live a more balanced life but, I do know that the more balanced I feel, the freer I become and I feel.
In my work I am quite often reminded that, what works for some doesn’t necessarily work for another; and that one person’s idea of balance may not resemble anything remotely balanced from another person’s viewpoint.
So I would like to address some of the various elements of life that can require balancing and offer some useful suggestions to find a mix that might work best for you.

To start with, what does it actually mean to be balanced?
According to the websters online dictionary (bal´anced)
adj. 1. Being in a state of proper balance or equilibrium;- opposite of unbalanced
Interesting! In my case this means that you have the ability to take control of the various elements in your life and do not feel, your heart or your mind is being pulled too hard in a particular direction. In other words, you feel calm, grounded, clear-headed, motivated and confident about yourself.
So how do you find your personal balance with a coach?
More often the elements in everyone’s life that require the most balancing are usually divided into two categories: internal and external. Most people focus on one more than the other.

As an example, you may find yourself focusing more on external things, like work, relationships, and other activities, and yet, you maybe pay very little attention to what is going on inside your heart and mind.

Again on the other hand, you may find yourself spend so much time being self reflective, that you are usually missing out on the experiences of living.

Others might be reasonably balanced between the two, but still might need to balance out some specific elements within each of the categories;
As a result I created this little outline to help each other better understand the beneficial components at both ends of each spectrum.

Internal (Mind, Heart, Health)
• Mind: Challenging your mind intellectually vs. creating the opportunities for your mind to rest
• Heart: Giving love vs. receiving love
• Health: Eating, drinking, exercising properly vs. resting and treating yourself to some extra junk food

External (Work, Social, Family, Fun)
• Work: Pushing yourself to achieve goals vs. seeing the big picture and enjoying the journey
• Social: Satisfying your social desires vs. taking time for yourself
• Family: Fulfilling your responsibilities vs. creating healthy boundaries
• Fun: Creating and allocating time for things you enjoy doing vs. making sure you don’t overdo it
As you can see, both ends of the spectrum are actually positive; but if either side is taken to the extreme, something that is intended to be positive can end up being very detrimental and harmful.

It’s usually very helpful to take time out and check in with yourself to see if you feel balanced and a Coach work with you on that.
If you feel that you’re being pulled in any one direction and feel uneasy about it, working with a Coach on these steps will definitely help you get your life realigned:

1. Acknowledgement Coaching
Take time to really look deeply at your life, at your state of mind, and how you are feeling. Be brutally honest with yourself and notice the areas of your life that you are neglecting.
2. Examination Coaching
Notice if you’re leaning more toward an internal or external focus, or if there are areas within each category that you would like to be more in balance with.
3. Setting Realistic and Measurable Goals Coaching
Write you ten most desired goals everyday and state them in the present, I do or I earn $ xxxx by December 10th!
Next see yourself with that goal make it real in your mind, try this for the next 30 days and remarkable things will happen.
Everyday you should write your goals down without looking at the previous day list and be sure to review them twice everyday, once in the morning and once before you go to sleep, as this helps the unconscious mind work out the patterns and language for you to obtain the goals you have stated.
4. Plan Tasks Coaching
Make a list of daily, weekly, and monthly tasks that you will need to do to achieve each of these goals. What have you tried in the past? Did it work? If not, what can you do differently?
When making this list put the most important task at the top of the paper and don’t go on to the next one until it is finished.
When you’ve finished that move on to the next one and do the same.
This is guaranteed to work! If you stick to it!
5. Reflection Coaching
What is the most important thing you’ve accomplished in the past? How did you stay focused toward this goal? How did you handle your fears, doubts, anxieties, worries, and negative self-talk? How does it feel to know that you accomplished the goal in spite of these parts of yourself?
Again this exercise will help you identify you qualities for making progress and will give you more confidence to perform better tasks in the future without fear.

6. Prepare Coaching
What’s your inner “stuff”? You know the stuff that will try to keep you from sticking to your plans (fears, worries, doubts, negative self talk)? Can you specify the things that you will say to yourself the stuff that will try to push you off track? (For example: “Just one more bite, sip, I’ll start eating better tomorrow”) Next week will be my starting point. Make a list. Failing to prepare is preparing to fail. You are the captain of your ship and only you can decide if you can sail freely and directly to your next port of call.
7. Empowering Coaching
What do you need to remember during these times? What are things you can say to that self-sabotaging gremlin inside your head, part of yourself that tried very hard and succeeds in making excuses for you? Be kind to yourself remember what you have achieved up until now and what are you thankful for?
Remember what you think about becomes reality.
Balance won’t feel good if you’re cruel to yourself while creating it!
8. Connections Coaching
Are there a people or a tactics you can use to keep yourself supported, motivated, and focused during the hard times? I highly recommend connecting and sharing your inner process with someone. Find someone who can help you challenge your inner demons, and celebrate your little accomplishments. Someone like a coach!
9. Plan Coaching
It usually takes about 30 days for the people to develop new habits.
Just like accomplishing any goal in life, it will take time and effort to overcome your habitual patterns and create new ones because you are so afraid to step out of that comfort zone you have created. If you stay on track with this detailed and intentional process for 30 days or more, then there is a excellent chance you will create new habits to enjoy and in turn reap the returns from a more balanced life!
10. If you can’t do it the first time try and try and try again, Coaching
Well that’s not quite true the word try is misleading, ever heard this “ If you don’t succeed try and try again” or Mike didn’t get the job! Well at least he tried. This means if you fail you will continue to fail, because you don’t know what to focus on and what to replace it with.
Most people think that quitting is the answer to their problems and there is always a right time to quit! Well, there’s never a right time! And you cannot quit!

As Einstein once said “We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them”.

There is no quitting, because we cannot stop the process once it has been set in motion it will always be there.

Adjusting to alternatives isn’t for everyone it’s just that some people do it better than others. Only a hand full of people know what isn’t working, and that it will take up valuable time and effort.
Working with a Coach can help you, to look at the alternatives that can replace the original problem.
Problems are here to stay and will never go away unless you’re dead!
So get comfortable with them, because they are the fuel in the fire of life.
There is no quitting just redirecting energy and thoughts.
As we are all very different and cannot be compared to others, working with a Coach allows us to observe and learn more about ourselves so, that we can communicate effectively and obtain balance in our lives.
At the end of the day, only we can make our problems work better for us.
If you constantly work your way around them and through them with your coach, you will become stronger, wiser, more effective and an even more motivated person with a balanced life.
Trust in yourself because, only you know you! Let your Coach help you find yourself.
I hope you like this? If not email me I would love to hear your feedback