Coaching will save your marriage.
Posted on March 26, 2015 by Chris Mott, One of Thousands of Career Coaches on Noomii.
Is your marriage struggling? Are you at a loss as to how to repair it? If so, then move in a different direction. Try fixing yourself first.
Coaching will save your marriage.
Is your marriage on the verge of collapse? If so, the solution is not to try and fix the marriage first, but rather, the participants in the marriage. Before you jump on my band wagon in agreement and start pointing that finger at your partner, you may want to consider; there’s never an innocent party in a broken marriage. Yes, one may have contributed more to the divorce, but you both end up wearing the same badge of failure.
Have you ever heard that expression, “placing the cart before the horse?” If so, it’s a perfect analogy for trying to fix the marriage first. If you placed the cart in front of the horse, how successful would the horse be at pulling the wagon? The answer is, there would be zero success. Why? Because he’s headed in the wrong direction. In this scenario, your broken marriage is the cart and what really needs to be fixed first is you. Yes, YOU.
Think about it. How did your marriage get to this compromised state? I bet it didn’t happen over night. Yes, there might be one big event which was the climax to your marital drama but I’d be willing to bet there were numerous infractions which led to the ultimate fracture. In most relationship life cycles there’s this little ingredient called complacency which starts to eat away at the strength and foundation of any union. You’ve seen it before. The courting process is so intense. Both parties are doing and saying all the right things. Then time takes hold and each participant starts to ease back on the gas pedal. Little liberties are taken each day and before you know it you’re asking yourself how you got here. Well the answer is, it’s not about the one unacceptable thing he or she did, but rather, the hundreds of small violations on both sides, which pushed the bounds of acceptable into the realm of the unacceptable. Weakness craftily crept up on you. That’s how it happened.
So what’s the answer? How do we restore the lines back to acceptable? The answer is by restoring each individuals energy to its highest potential. Why is the energy so important? Because your relationship success is directly linked to attraction. Think about it. Remember back to the days when the other person couldn’t possibly say or do a bad thing. It wasn’t because they were perfect, but rather, their energy was attractive. You had more love, understanding, and forgiveness when the attraction was present.
During the coaching process, we resurrect individuals and marriages in 12 short weeks. The first eight weeks are solely devoted to coaching the individuals separately but similarly. Each individual follows the same coaching progression all while working on their individual shortcomings. Problems and challenges which were of high priority at the beginning of the coaching process drift away. We then move into combined coaching sessions armed with a new very powerful and attractive energy and low and behold the communication is restored. Once we’re communicating again in a highly productive manner, it’s so joyful to build the new foundation for a stronger than ever union and to keep writing the couples love story.
