Five Tips to Avoid Parenting Burnout
Posted on March 20, 2015 by Drena Fagen, One of Thousands of Entrepreneurship Coaches on Noomii.
Working all the time can lead to feelings of burnout. But what is frequently misunderstood is that burnout is not actually the result of overwork.
Parenting is work, and working all the time can lead to feelings of burnout. But what is frequently misunderstood is that burnout is not actually the result of overwork. Burnout occurs when you feel overwhelmed and undervalued. It is “a crisis of self-efficacy.”(1) If you experience a gap between your expectations and feelings of success, reward, or recovery from the effort you put in, you are at high risk for burnout. Doesn’t this sound exactly like parenting?
BURNOUT can look a lot like depression. The symptoms are similar. The causes are NOT!
• Emotions are blunted
• Produces helplessness and hopelessness
• Loss of motivation, ideals, and hope
• Leads to detachment and depression
• May make life seem not worth living
Here are a few tips to reduce feelings of burnout.
1. Slow down. Be mindful. Appreciate small moments,
2. Ask for help. This is not an admission of defeat.
3. Reevaluate your parenting goals and sharing of responsibilities.
4. Adjust your thinking about parenting by relaxing your idealism.
5. Challenge negative thoughts, i.e. Replace feelings of inadequacy
with compassion for your effort – “I am doing the best I can.”
Parenting is work. All work can lead to burnout.
•Feeling like you have little or no control over your
child’s behavior
•Lack of recognition or rewards for good parent-related work.
•Unclear or overly demanding parenting expectations.
•Doing tasks that are boring, monotonous or unchallenging.
•Feeling pressure to perform from other adults (spouse, grandparents, friends, etc.) in your environment
Is your lifestyle causing burnout?
•Not enough time for relaxing & socializing with adults.
•Being expected to be too many things to too many people.
•Taking on too many responsibilities, without enough help from others
•Not getting enough sleep
•Lack of close, supportive relationships outside family
Personality traits can contribute to burnout
•Perfectionistic tendencies; nothing is ever good enough
•Exaggerated sense of responsibility
• Self-doubt & guilt (when unable to meet own expectations)
•The need to be in control; reluctance to delegate to others
•High-achieving, Type A personality
“Developing gratitude and healthy boundaries and releasing need for control are the best weapons against burnout.”(2)
1. Source: Christina Maslach, burnout researcher
2. Source: Oreskovich, M., & Anderson, J. (2013)