Turning Regret Into Opportunities
Posted on September 07, 2014 by Hanneberit Hahnemann, One of Thousands of Career Coaches on Noomii.
By Hanne-Berit Hahnemann, Career Coach Cleveland Ohio. Regrets are part of life, but this blog is about how regrets can turn into great opportunities.
regret
Pronunciation: /rɪˈɡrɛt
VERB (regrets, regretting, regretted)
Feel sad, repentant, or disappointed over (something that one has done or failed to do):
Ever regret something you did or didn’t do? Uhm, yes. I can hear the resounding nods through cyberspace as if you are all sitting right across from me in my kitchen in Cleveland, Ohio. If you are older than 10, you have probably already regretted a few things. If you are older than 40, you may want to hit yourself over the head about a few things you wish you had or had not done. You are, after all, human. But, here is the question. What to do with it? Maybe you ponder about this often. Or downright stew. Some of you live in regret and let it control your thoughts and actions. The regrets depress you and sadden you and make you feel awful at times. Why you didn’t graduate or get a college degree, why you married the wrong person, why you didn’t stand up for yourself in life, why you sold the house you loved. Why you treated someone close to you, in a way you wish you hadn’t. Think which one best describes you, or pick something else, then rank it from 0-10, 10 being the worst feeling of regret.
Now, think of a totally different way of dealing with it. Consider for a moment your regret being the greatest lesson and brand new compass for the future. Where could it take you? Think closely about what this feeling has done for you the last many years and ask yourself a brand new question: with what I know now, what do I want the next 10 years to look like?
opportunity
ɒpəˈtjuːnɪti/
noun
a time or set of circumstances that makes it possible to do something.
synonyms:
chance, lucky chance, good time, golden opportunity, time, occasion,moment, favourable time/occasion/moment, right set of circumstances,appropriate time/occasion/moment, suitable time/occasion/moment,opportune time/occasion/moment, opening, option, window (of opportunity), slot, turn, go, (clear) run, field day.
In the name of disclosure, I can tell everyone I have specific regrets, such as selling a house I loved – and to make sure I really didn’t learn, I did this twice! I also have some general ones, such as multiple instances of letting pride getting the best of me. Using this last one as an opportunity for growth, I pledge to myself that I will reign this habit in big time. I will have more awareness. And every night for the next many weeks I will take some time and look at where my pride was throughout my day. Feeling the relief already! I do not want pride to get in my way of relationships or work opportunities. Regrets can be painful, but they are part of life. Turn them into an advantage and allow them to teach you something you can use from here on out.
Use all the tools you have, regret being one of them. So be kind to yourself and cut yourself some slack for a change! (Here you may want to read my blog about self-compassion). Don’t hit yourself over the head about your shortcomings or the “awful” things you have done. Turn them into gifts or opportunities and praise yourself for your turnaround!
Remember, you were born to shine!