4 Steps to Access Your Inner Knowing in Relationship

Posted on March 05, 2014 by Ali Palisca, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.

Every moment you are making a decision. For example, a family party, you might decide to sit and talk to your aunt or walk across the room and fill your plate with appetizers. What informs your decision? Are you hungry? Do you stay and talk to your aunt to be polite? Do you choose to get a plate of food to distract yourself?

Listening to your inner knowing and following it may defy social norms, and sometimes will require courage. When you follow your inner knowing, however, you are carving a sturdy path for living in integrity. You learn to trust that, when you do what is best for you, you are also doing what is best for everyone.

So, how do you find out what is best for you and in service to others? How do you listen to your inner knowing?

1. BODY: Your body is a direct line of communication to your instincts and will always tell you honestly what is best for you and what needs shifting.
Scan your three centers of intelligence, GUT, HEART, HEAD, what are the sensations you notice?

Tightness, pulling, expanding, throbbing, pounding, fluttery, shivery, queasy, wobbly, bubbly, dizzy, spacey, breathless, prickly, electric, tingling, nervy, twitchy, burning, radiating, referring, buzzy, itchy, wooden, dull, dense, frozen, icy, thick, blocked, contracted, heavy, suffocated, cold, numb, closed, dark, hollow, empty, tense, constricted, clenched, knotted, hot full, sweaty, calm, expanded, open, fluttery, bubbly, numb, jabbing, etc.

I’m noticing tightness and contraction across my shoulders and pulling on my neck. My chest feels blocked.

2. FEELINGS: As you notice the sensations in your body, also wonder, what is your body telling you?

What are the closest feelings that you are experiencing?

Anger, sadness, fear, joy, sexual

I’m feeling angry.

3. THOUGHTS: What are the thoughts that are running through your head?

I am making up the story that the conversations I have with my family are fake.

4. WHAT’S NEXT? Now, take a moment to breathe into each of your centers, your GUT, HEART, and HEAD. What sensations do you notice after naming that thought?

I notice my heart expand and a settling in my gut.

After looping back to your centers, do you have any more information about what would best support you in this moment?

Going outside and taking a walk and breathing would best support me right now.

When you think about going outside for a walk and breathing, what sensations do you notice in your body now?

I notice my chest opening up and expanding into my throat and a smile is coming to my face.

When you follow your inner knowing, and act on the information your body is giving you, you will step into the unknown. You don’t know what will happen after you go on a walk outside and breathe. Maybe you will decide that what you really want is to go home, or maybe you will decide that you really want to connect with your aunt. Whatever you decide to do, when you open up to your inner knowing, you embark upon an unpaved path and open yourself to the possibilities the universe has to offer you.

Ali Palisca, Certified Life Coach
Awaken Your Vitality
alipalisca.com