You Can't Make An Imperfect Decision

Posted on June 25, 2013 by Suzette R Hinton, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

I am where I am because I made the perfect decision to get me here. I am not a victim. The negative consequences as well as the positive ones are the result of absolute perfection.

In his book, THE HEART OF THE SOUL, Gary Zukav has a chapter entitled “Perfectionism.” Most thought-provoking is his belief that every decision in life yields a perfect consequence. He says that the whole principle behind perfectionism is that something is not perfect and we have to correct it. But he believes we cannot make an imperfect decision.

According to Mr. Zukav, our actions are perfect. If I find myself alone and isolated from others, I made the perfect choices to encourage this state. Zukav says “all choices create perfect consequences. Some choices create consequences that are more destructive than consequences created by other choices. Some choices create consequences that are more nurturing.” He continues, “a choice to exploit another person cannot create a bond of respect and appreciation. It can create only violence and destruction.” When I consider this, I realize that I am where I am in my life because I made the perfect decisions to help me arrive here.

I can remember my teen years and my 20s. If I wanted someone to pay attention to me, I would do things in an effort to get the person to give me attention. At the time, I didn’t understand that my actions were due to my own feelings of insecurity. Hence, I resorted to manipulation and control tactics to get what I wanted. Funny thing though, the attention was short-lived and I’d ultimately end up alone and feeling even more insecure.

What about the innocent children who are born in grossly dysfunctional families? Or even more bewildering, what about those who had great childhoods yet find themselves in negative situations? Or what about things beyond our control like the untimely death of a spouse? I asked these questions as I read. But the more I read, it dawned on me that Mr. Zukav was not ascribing guilt or saying that we are at fault. He argues that we are not victims. We are powerful. Even if that power is misguided, it doesn’t make us any less powerful. Therefore, our efforts are wasted when we spend time trying to make ourselves perfect or make others perfect.

Life is a journey. Regardless to whether I am prepared or not prepared, know where I’m going or don’t have a clue, choose to take my chances or have a road map, Hwy 40 is Hwy 40. And if I get on that highway and stay on that highway, I’ll arrive exactly where that highway takes me. The highway doesn’t discriminate.

This might sound like bad news, but I see it as quite empowering. If I am on a highway that I don’t wish to be on or I’ve arrived someplace where I don’t wish to stay, I have choices. I can choose to look back over my journey and only grieve over it or I can find where I took the wrong exit or made the wrong turn. I can continue to take exits out of fear and frustration, or I can choose to ask for help from someone who knows the path and can tell me how to get on the right highway.

I can choose to be impatient with myself or I can choose to be understanding. I didn’t get here overnight and I won’t get out of here overnight. It’ll take time and commitment. If the truth be told, most times we have to drive right back down that wrong road before we’ll get back to the exit to get back on the right highway. But this time, we’ll be traveling in the OPPOSITE direction.

My life coach said to me, “where you are right now is a gift.” It is perfect. It is the perfect opportunity for you to learn more about yourself, finish what’s not finished and have what you want for your life.