Perfectly Authentic
Posted on June 17, 2013 by Cassandra Patterson, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
The pursuit of authenticity over the pursuit of perfection in daily living.
In preparation to my first video recording for my website, my public speaking coach and I got into a conversation about feedback that took an interesting turn. Initially, our discussion centered on why we don’t like receiving feedback. Whether it’s listening to a recording, watching a video or listening to critique, feedback has the tendency to make us uncomfortable.
Essentially I believe our tendency to avoid feedback stems from the fear of facing our imperfections. It’s almost as if you’re looking into an HD mirror that magnifies all your imperfections and highlights every mistake. My coach went on to mention that perfection should not be our focus, instead we should strive for authenticity, to which I replied “perfectly authentic”.
This conversation definitely struck a chord with me and by his tone I knew that was his intention. My thought was, “What’s wrong with wanting to be perfect?” The truth is, nothing is wrong with wanting to be perfect if that’s what will make you happy, which is highly unlikely and everything if you want to be happy and be yourself. In pursuing perfection, do we often loose our authenticity? The truth is that the standard of perfection is subject to change because it’s determined by whoever is setting the standard of perfection at the time. Therefore, perfection, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder and a constantly moving target. It is subject to time, culture and a variety of social constructs. Webster initially defines perfect as being entirely without fault or defect. However, the secondary definition is faithfully reproducing the original. In this context that would mean pursuing perfection is in essence copying someone else and completely losing your own identity.
On the other hand, authentic is defined as not false or imitation. The philosophy of authenticity, as it relates to existentialism, states the following:
“Authenticity is the degree to which one is true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character, despite external pressures; the conscious self is seen as coming to terms with being in a material world and with encountering external forces, pressures and influences which are very different from, and other than, itself.”
In essence, in our pursuit of success, we must resist the urge to change ourselves into what or who we believe we need to be in order to be successful. Otherwise we will remain in constant pursuit of a moving target, forcing us to change to meet someone else’s expectation which can result in a loss of true self and unhappiness. The truth is you can only really be happy being yourself, despite our imperfections. The key is to not let those imperfections define or hinder us, but to see each imperfection or mistake as a challenge, an opportunity to grow and improve at being you. Once you’ve mastered being yourself, not only will you have achieved perfection, but authenticity as well.
On that note, I’ll leave you with this quote by the legendary Bruce Lee:
“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.”
