When you can’t find the right words!
Posted on April 25, 2012 by Keith Hill, One of Thousands of ADD ADHD Coaches on Noomii.
What to do when you need to express emotion.
Imagine you are having a discussion with a friend, co-worker, or significant other and reach a point where you feel they are just not getting what you are trying to say. You have some very strong emotions, but your words are failing to carry that emotion. You don’t want to yell, or push too hard because it might strain the relationship. You my friend have verbal constipation, and if you don’t come up with a solution, your friends will run away from you due to miscommunication and frustration. Here is something you can do about this problem right now.
Practice and review this on a regular basis. Never just say that you are happy or mad. These generic phrases rarely communicate your true feelings.
1. Try one or two of these words instead when you are upset:
Unhappy, disappointed, distressed, disappointed, disturbed, saddened, troubled, offended, displeased, mourning, grieving, mixed up, out of balance, disorganized, dismayed, wounded, troubled, weepy, letdown, confused, out of synch, inner turmoil, shook up, lonely, afraid, worried, concerned.
2. Here are a few when you are happy:
Pleased, full of joy, giggly, pleasure, satisfied, contented, grateful, hopeful, enthusiastic, cheerful, optimistic, in high spirits, blissful, exultant, cheerful, on cloud nine, lucky, blessed, fortunate, delighted, thankful, relieved.
3. Use emotional emphasis. The emotional content of sentences are increased through the use of intonation that emphasizes and exaggerates emotion.
Example: You are so very kind. I really want you to know I am so grateful.
You must remember that this is going to take some practice. You must get over the fear and awkwardness to reach the reward of social confidence. It’s like riding a bike. You are going to fall down the first few times, but if you keep at it, you will be cruising in no time.