Secret to Peace, Joy, and Happiness

Posted on March 19, 2025 by Todd Adams, One of Thousands of Spirituality Coaches on Noomii.

What determines your level of peace, joy and happiness or more accurately fear, pain, and suffering comes from your beliefs. The inner judge is what uses all of your beliefs about you, your world, how things should be, right and wrong, good and bad, righteous and evil, etc, to create your perception and therefore your reaction to you and your world. The difference between what is and how your judge says things should be is the depth of your unhappiness and pain.
The following discussion will cover, in broad strokes and without the more esoteric aspects, how you create your reality and why it isn’t what your mind tells you it should be.
Your reality is created by your perception. Individual perception is how each person views and experiences their world. It is how you create the stories about how things happened in the past, how they will happen in the future, and what is going on around you in each moment. Your perception literally changes the physical reality you experience, but that is for another discussion. Let’s just say that perception is your most powerful tool to create any life you choose. Yes, many of you probably just had a bunch of thoughts screaming why that isn’t true, and many that exclaimed how true it is. Please take a look at my other articles on the site for more information.
What are your perceptions? You receive information about your surroundings through your 5 senses (along with a bunch more inner senses that you constantly use but have been conditioned to ignore). The info that your senses take in are then processed through your mind to determine what they mean. This process includes running every input through your book of judgements (I also refer to this as your book of opinions, book of law, and book of conditioning). This is where you shift everything from direct awareness to perception. The filter of your judgements is what limits and creates your reality so that you can learn whatever lessons will move your evolution forward in any given moment.
Your judgements/opinions come from the conditioning you receive throughout your life. All of the opinions and judgements that your family, friends, and society you belong to were directly conditioned into your mind from birth on. This conditioning is a natural process that teaches you how to interact with society and to be a semi functioning person within it. This is also when you accept the idea of conditional love which is then the basis for your everyone’s primary core wound.
Every culture and society has their own ideas of right and wrong, good/bad, righteous/evil, should/shouldn’t. These ideas, which society has demanded you believe are permanent and incontrovertible truth, are just opinions that each society decided to implement as a working outline for their culture to work. The biggest issue with this is that those societal opinions are driven into it’s members as “truth”. These “truths” are relative, not universal. They are only valid to the people that identify with and are attached to them. The attachment causes each individual to continuously feed their power and energy into upholding their cultures opinions. These “truths” create each person’s perception of reality so that certain specific lessons can be learned which drives evolution.
How does an opinion become a truth? The way an idea moves from opinion to truth is through attachment or identification. A relative “truth” starts out as an idea. When more energy, awareness, and attachment are applied, the idea becomes an opinion. As one goes through day to day life, perception filters will search for anything that backs up the opinion which adds more energy and charge. With enough energy and awareness applied, you will find within your external and internal world everything you need to verify the opinion as true. You will begin to exert pressure onto your world to create and give you exactly the evidence you are looking for. The added energy and perceived evidence will shift the opinion to a belief. This increasing focus and energy upon the opinion will exclude all the data that refutes the opinion which further deepens the attachment. The more you identify with the belief, the more emotional energy will be incurred. You now have an idea that you can only see as true and anything that goes against it will be ignored or completely invisible (to you). This opinion is now a belief that you will see as part of your world and self.
Now that you have a belief, it will be shifted into the background so you don’t consciously put energy into keeping it. It becomes invisible to you as a belief because it is now perceived as “how it is”. This is when reality begins shifting to match your belief. Every belief creates a constant stream of self talk, fantasizing, along with day and night dreaming. Your thoughts will then loop constantly repeating your belief over and over and over and over. Each belief will have it’s own constant thought soundtrack running through your mind 24/7/365. These thoughts become the creators of your stories, and they are all built to uphold and maintain each belief. Have you ever stopped to really listen to your continuous stream of self talk? Are you able to quieten or stop it completely for more than a moment? This is what keeps you imprisoned in your pain and suffering. How does the constant unconscious thinking create your pain and suffering?
All of your beliefs combine to create an image of perfection – for the world and for your self. You hold yourself and the world up to this image, and then create pain for yourself when nothing measures up perfectly all the time. You compare and judge everything you perceive against all of your beliefs of right vs wrong. You demand that you, the world, and everyone in it abide by your book of law.
Each thought generates an emotional charge based on how your mind compares the perceptions of what is to how it “should” be. The more a belief ties to your view of self and the world (the more you are identified/attached), the more intense the emotional reaction. Here is where we get stuck.
Every time you have an emotional reaction without processing it, it will stay in your body/system until processed. As you go through life, any emotion not fully processed will stay in your system until you process it. Every time you have an emotional reaction that generates an unprocessed negative emotion – that additional emotional energy will attach to the previously stored and unprocessed emotions with a similar charge.

So the negative emotions stuck within you will continue to build up and come together until you get to the breaking point. The breaking point is where you explode and release pent up emotional energy – just enough to push it back down and cap it again. These unprocessed emotions tied to each belief will completely cloud and dictate your perception of you and your world. Your clouded mind will lash out at anything outside or inside you that doesn’t measure up to your book of judgements. You will only be able to see those negative emotions in everything. This is what generates all of the pain you create for yourself. These repressed negative emotions stuck in you are the walls that keep you unaware of the true source of your pain. Your thoughts will keep you chasing your tail and continually adding more negative emotion until you explode and collapse again instead of facing your self so that real change and healing can happen.
This leads people to try anything to heal themselves – mostly on the level of form (physical, mental, emotional, energetic). They try all kinds of healing modalities that typically only directly affect 1 maybe 2 elements that are thought to be creating personal pain and suffering. These healings may give a brief reprieve, but if you do not go inside and find and change what is truly holding and driving your wounds…your pain and suffering will return in one form or another.
All you have to do is change your beliefs, which changes your emotional state, which will change your perception and therefore your world. Sounds easy peasy right? The concept is very simple as far as what/how, but it tends to be the most difficult thing anyone will do. It requires that you face and process the negative emotions you have held most of your life and are attached to the beliefs that are creating those emotions. Upon processing your pain and emotions, you use your awareness to find and change the thoughts maintaining the beliefs you hold that are continuing to cause the emotional pain. The way to permanently change your thoughts is to change the beliefs driving the unconscious and constant stream of thoughts. A quick note – you have to replace a belief, your mind will not let you just erase it. Before you can replace or change a belief, you have to find and understand it and then remove the strong emotional charge tied to it that keeps it energized and perpetuated.
Most beliefs that people hold are completely invisible to them. They have converted the belief into an incontrovertible “truth”. They no longer can see that it is just an opinion they have chosen to accept as reality. There is a lot of work to be done to uncover all of the beliefs that have been creating your pain and then to change them. It is a very simple process yet extremely difficult. No one wants to face their pain. We have been conditioned to be judges, victims, and hold deep personal importance…all of which keep you from moving into your Peace and Joy of Being.
To summarize, change your beliefs and you will change your world.