The Systemic Lens: Seeing Ourselves, Others, and the World as Systems

Posted on December 19, 2024 by Anna Milaeva, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

When I started my journal, my goal was to explore and share my professional and personal journey with Self-leadership, especially through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS). Over time, it has become a space for reflecting on how this work translates not just into personal transformation, but into a broader framework for understanding ourselves, others, and the systems we live in.

Today, I want to go back to the basics and focus on one of the foundational pillars of IFS: its systemic vision.

IFS is a systemic model of therapy, but to me, it’s so much more than that. It’s a way of living, a language for understanding ourselves and the world. It offers a lens of compassion, validation, and gentleness, allowing us to hold space for the complexity and contradictions of human experience—inside ourselves and around us.

So, what does “systemic” really mean in IFS? And why does adopting a systemic perspective matter?

Let’s dive in.

What Does “Systemic” Mean in IFS?
At its heart, IFS views humans as systems of parts, and these parts interact within us much like members of a family. Just as a family has dynamics—conflicts, alliances, and roles—our internal parts also have their own roles, emotions, and ways of functioning.

But the systemic vision doesn’t stop there. It extends outward:

Each person is a system of parts.

Families, workplaces, and communities are systems.

Society, nature, and the universe itself are systems within systems.

This perspective helps us see the interconnectedness of everything, recognizing that individual healing doesn’t happen in isolation but within the broader context of relationships, environments, and histories.

The Basic Laws of Systems
Systems operate under certain principles, whether we’re talking about our inner world or the external world.

Let’s look at a few key laws and how they relate to IFS:
1. Interconnectedness
Every element in a system is connected to others, and a change in one part affects the whole.

In IFS: When one part of you heals or shifts, the entire system adjusts. For example, if an exiled part lets go of its burden, protective parts may begin to feel more relaxed, and you might notice more calm and clarity in your daily life.

2. Balance and Homeostasis
Systems strive to maintain balance, even if that balance isn’t ideal.

In IFS: This explains why some parts cling to burdens or extreme roles—they believe their actions are keeping the system stable. Healing often involves showing these parts that new, more functional forms of balance are possible.

3. Feedback Loops
Systems are influenced by feedback—both positive and negative—that reinforces or changes patterns.

In IFS: Feedback comes from our environment, relationships, and internal dialogues. For example, when you respond to a part with curiosity instead of judgment, it creates a positive feedback loop that builds trust within your system.

4. Hierarchy and Holarchy
Systems exist within other systems, creating hierarchies or holarchies (where each part is whole in itself but also part of a greater whole).

In IFS: Your internal system exists within the larger system of your family, workplace, and society. Recognizing this can help you see how external dynamics influence your internal experience—and vice versa.

5. Emergence
The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.

In IFS: When parts work harmoniously under the leadership of the Self, something new and transformative emerges—inner balance, creativity, and a sense of purpose that wasn’t possible when parts were in conflict.

Why a Systemic Perspective Matters
1. Inside Ourselves
Viewing ourselves as systems allows us to step out of self-criticism and judgment. Instead of labeling emotions or behaviors as “bad,” we can recognize them as our parts doing their best within the system. This perspective brings compassion and curiosity, paving the way for real healing.

2. With Others
When we see others as systems, it changes how we relate. That difficult colleague? They’re a system of parts, just like you, doing their best based on their own experiences and burdens. This doesn’t excuse harmful behavior, but it invites us to respond with understanding instead of reactivity.

3. In Communities and Beyond
Systemic thinking helps us address issues in families, workplaces, and society at their root, rather than just managing symptoms. It reminds us that every action creates ripples, and by working toward harmony in our own system, we contribute to the health of the larger systems we’re part of.

The Beauty and Benefit of Systemic Thinking
When we adopt a systemic perspective, we tap into a deeper understanding of connection. We see the threads that weave through our inner world and the outer world, creating a tapestry of interdependence.

In IFS, this means recognizing that each part of us has a purpose and a gift, each person in our lives has their own journey, and each system we belong to has the potential for transformation.

Systemic thinking is not just about healing—it’s about growing into a more compassionate, interconnected way of being. It’s about seeing the beauty in complexity and the potential in every interaction, every relationship, every part.

Reflect and Explore
Can you notice the systems in your own life—within yourself, your family, your workplace? How do they interact and influence each other?

How might your relationships change if you saw others as systems of parts, each carrying their own burdens and trying their best?

What’s one small shift you can make in your own system today to create ripples of healing in the systems around you?

Let’s continue this exploration together—of ourselves, our systems, and the infinite connections that shape our lives.