Navigating Political Differences in a Marriage: A Guide for the 2024 Elections
Posted on June 26, 2024 by Dee Stevens, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.
I’ll share my personal story of how politics affected my own relationship and offer advice on managing political differences within a marriage.
Growing Up ApoliticalIn my upbringing, politics was a non-topic. My parents didn’t vote, and I had no concept of political affiliation until I asked one day and learned we were Democrats. At that time, I didn’t know what being a Democrat or a Republican entailed. This political indifference carried over into my adulthood until my marriage brought my political naivety to light.
The Political Divide in My Marriage
When I married, I noticed my husband often called me a “liberal,” which he used as a demeaning term. This puzzled me as we never explicitly discussed politics. My next serious relationship also ended due to political differences, though we never actually talked about them. I didn’t vote until my 30s, driven by educational issues on the ballot that directly impacted my career.
Despite my left-leaning tendencies, I’ve always been drawn to conservative men. This dynamic has shaped my relationship for the past 20 years, and here’s what I’ve learned about navigating political differences in a marriage.
- 1. Be Curious
Curiosity is the first step to understanding. In my marriage, I started asking non-accusatory questions to understand what made me a liberal and my husband a conservative. This approach helped us both see our different beliefs more clearly.
- 2. Listen with an Open Mind
Listening with an open mind means questioning your own beliefs and considering them as one version of the truth. It also involves controlling your reactions when you hear views you disagree with. Through this, I recognized the stereotypes both my husband and I held about each other’s political affiliations.
- 3. Find Common Ground
Despite our political differences, my husband and I discovered many shared values. Finding common ground helps reinforce the foundational beliefs that initially brought you together. As we found these commonalities, I educated my husband on my perspectives, dispelling his stereotypes of what a “liberal” is.
- 4. Reframe Your Thoughts Around the Relationship
This step involves agreeing to disagree on some points or seeing your partner in a new light. I began to see my husband as someone who protects me and ensures I’m not taken advantage of, rather than as an enemy. Recognizing that there is no absolute right or wrong in our beliefs has helped us appreciate how we balance and educate each other.
- 5. Seek Help for Finding Peace
If political differences are causing significant strain, consider seeking help from a relationship coach or therapist. Professional guidance can provide the communication skills necessary to navigate these tough conversations without causing further harm to the relationship.
Navigating political differences in a marriage, especially during the contentious 2024 elections, requires patience, understanding, and effective communication. Remember, it’s about finding common ground and appreciating the diverse perspectives you both bring to the relationship. Take care, and I’ll see you next time.