Who's the Boss in Marriage?
Posted on December 13, 2011 by Demetria Rupkey, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
The husband and wife should work together towards a common goal. Compromise is the perpetual stepping stone to a healthy and equal marriage.
Time has told the tale over and over again about who is the boss within a marriage. Since the beginning of time the man has always been the boss in the marriage. Traditionally the women were to have and raise the children. The men were to work , provide financially for the family , discipline the children and make all the decisions. This was a rather unfair venture on both sides.
Up until 1848 women had virtually no rights except to bear and raise children. Women had no right to work , vote , own property or make family decisions among many other things. This made men the boss in the marriage. The men decided everything concerning family, children and finances. This is the way it was dictated to women from the beginning of time. Even in the Bible it says that man is the head of the household.
In 1848 things began to change for women. The first Women’s Rights Convention was held on July 19 and 20 , 1848. This meeting brought together approximately 300 men and women to discuss the the standing of women in the social , civil and religious circles of life. By the end of the second day a Declaration of Sentiments was signed by 68 women and 32 men. This document is very interesting and can be found at the link at the end of this article.
Since this day in history Women have exercised their freedoms, in doing so it changed the institution of marriage for good. Things did change slowly though. Even through the 1800’s and into the early 1900’s men were still considered to be the boss of the marriage or head of the household. Women were allowed to vote and own property but still had little to no value in the marriage.
There really is no set time or place as to when it changed but over time women became less of a slave to the marriage and more of an equal to the marriage. Men and women’s thinking has evolved over the recent years. There are still traditional marriages in this day and age where the woman is subservient to the man, but it is because it is her choice not her duty. Things have changed so much in fact that there are some marriages where the woman could be considered the boss of the marriage . My challenge is this , why does it have to be one way or the other?
In this world we live in today there is no reason for man or woman to take on the stress and inequality of making all the family decisions. The word marriage conveys the unity of two people. If two people are united as one in wedlock why would one person take on all aspects of a relationship? Unless it is the choice of both parties to have a traditional marriage then things should be equal. Rather than one or the other making this decision or that the husband and wife should work together towards a common goal. Compromise is the perpetual stepping stone to a healthy and equal marriage.
