Speaking with Confidence
Posted on November 16, 2023 by Nora Paxton, One of Thousands of Executive Coaches on Noomii.
How can our choice of words influence the confidence we convey?
Great leaders capture their audiences. Their speaking style can be sometimes simplistic and repetitive – and yet they manage to convince their audience of what they are saying.
It all comes down to the power with which they speak.
Below are some simple strategies you can use to convey confidence to your audience:
• Pretend you’re 100 percent convinced of your point by using absolutes such as “definitely,” “obviously,” and “clearly.” Avoid hedges. Hedges are phrases like “I think,” “perhaps,” and “sort of.” We use them to signal that something is our personal opinion and we’re not quite sure of it. Which suggests a lack of confidence. Absolutes, on the other hand, suggest things are crystal clear. And people are much more interested in listening to something that seems irrefutable.
A word of caution: sometimes being overly direct can have a negative effect. When people are confronted with facts that go against their own beliefs, they tend to shut down and stop listening. They become hard to persuade. So when you already know someone has a drastically different opinion than you, expressing doubt about your own opinion can actually make them more sympathetic to your point.
• Eliminate filler words such as “uh,” “um,” and “er.” Speakers who use a lot of filler words are perceived as less powerful and lower status. Simply waiting a little longer before you talk can reduce the number of filler words you’ll need.
• Finally, speak in the present tense. When you express your thoughts or ideas using present tense verbs, you give the impression that you are firmly grounded in the present moment and have a clear understanding of the topic at hand. This can help you project confidence in what you are saying and make your statements sound more immediate and decisive.
Same goes to writing in the present tense can enhance the sense of immediacy and make your statements feel more assertive. By describing events as if they are happening in the present moment, you create a strong and direct impact on the reader. For example, Saying a book “is” an amazing read suggests that this is still the case. Saying it “was” an amazing read suggests that perhaps this was only true at a particular point in time.
Remember, confidence can make all the difference in whether your audience buys your point or not.
Let me know how it goes.
Wishing you continued growth and success,
With gratitude,
Nora Paxton