How about you Flip-IT?

Posted on October 12, 2023 by Loulia Kayali, One of Thousands of Business Coaches on Noomii.

Imagine that every morning you wake up and you put on your glasses that have a yellow tint. Every day when you put them on, you will see the world with a yellow tint. Over time you might forget that your glasses are tinted yellow, and you start to believe that the world, through your eyes, has a yellow glaze to it. But that’s not true!
The glasses analogy offers us a clearer understanding of how easy it is to see something in a particular way “your perspective”. By changing the way, we see something, reframing our perspective, everything can look very different.

The concept of ‘reframing’ a negative perspective to a positive point of view is crucial because often a simple shift in perception can have quite dramatic results on our lives. This does not mean to ignore or surpass the negativity as if it doesn’t exist, not at all. It simply means acknowledging it, understanding it then moving forward and challenging yourself in seeing the other side of the coin! The way we choose our perspectives is creating our experiences. It might not be a conscious choice, but it is certainly a choice.

WHAT IS A POWER TOOL?
The definition of the power tool comes from a new way of thinking, or experience new ways of living. It takes you from a powerless situation (because it’s not your fault) to the driver’s seat where you can now choose a different path and take some control of your life and future.
As you might know, we can’t change the world we live in, but we can change how we see it. Some ways of ‘seeing’ are more empowering than others.

Let’s have a look what are these tools;

- Trying vs commitment:
To try to do something, and to act or talk without intent. ‘Trying’ can be a very disempowering and exhausting.
Making a commitment instead is to become dedicated to the achievement of a goal. It implies the willingness to do what it takes to make it happen.
- Blame vs Responsibility:
To judge or attribute fault or wrong-doing to the action or inaction of others we are giving away our power and positioning ourselves as the victim.
On the other hand, when we own our participation in something we hold ourselves accountable for the results and we are taking back control and putting ourselves in the driver’s seat of our own life.
- Doubt vs Trust
While trust is a magical word that evokes calm, peace, and security, doubt is uncertainty based on fear and assumptions about someone or something that places us on high alert. Having doubt can sometimes be the first step in creating change, but It’s also like deliberately creating space for things to go wrong. Trust is also a firm belief in the reliability or truth of someone or something.
- Invalidation vs Respect
Not acknowledging or appreciating the worth and value of someone or something (including yourself) is a sort of invalidation. It’s about rejecting, ignoring, or judging. As humans, we all have an overwhelming desire to be seen and heard. Therefore, respect is about acknowledging or appreciating the worth and value of someone or something (including yourself) considering our differences.
- Significance vs Lightness
Significance is a bit like being “stuck”. Feeling overwhelmed and heavy and being overly attached to a particular outcome or belief! Being in the moment and coming from a perspective of creativity and possibility is a sign of lightness like walking in a pool of sunlight, closing your eyes and let whatever else is going on fade away.
- Delay vs Action
Procrastination loves the company of delay. Could, would, should etc. those lead to postponing an action consciously or unconsciously. As you know, bicycles can carry you from point A to point B. However, it’s the action of your legs that creates the motion otherwise you’re still.
Indeed, you will never reach your destination without pedaling in a chosen direction. Action is what creates and complete our dreams, hopes and desires.
- Reacting vs Responding
BAM!! Reactions are immediate and sometimes astonishing. To act in a defensive way without taking long term effects into consideration causes regrettable results. Responding is a choice that help us replying in a mindful way from a grounded perspective.
- Fraud vs Truth
Each day we receive messages about how we should behave and what we should strive towards. Have you ever deceived yourself? Lack of alignment with your values creates fraud to your self-image.
Here’s the truth, being authentic and acting in alignment with your values is shifting uncomfortably in your seat. Ask yourself to look deeply into your beliefs and values and encourages you to discover what a truly meaningful life would look like for you. Are you living your truth?

SO, how to Flip-It?
Any situation or event can be approached with fear and trepidation, or with confidence and curiosity. Well, it does not take one easy step to do it, but it’s possible. With some efforts, willingness, and constant training we can make it happen.
Having said that, there’re four steps to re-setting your lens and adopting a fresh way of ‘seeing’ the world, so you can move from where you are now to where you want to be. Let’s go through it.

● Step 1: IDENTIFY AN ISSUE OR CHALLENGE (FIND it)
It might be a new problem, or it could be a challenging situation you have tried to solve several times in the past only to put it off for another time. We often postpone certain problems as we don’t know how to face them.
Therefore, an important step to make a meaningful change is to define the problem fully and properly.

● Step 2: WORK OUT HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT IT (FEEL it)
Is it sadness? Frustration? Something else? Pinpoint exactly what feelings are occurring in relation to your problem or challenge. Sometimes we jump straight into fix-it mode and skip the step of expressing feelings and connecting them to the issue. When you don’t allow time to feel your emotions or sit in your feelings, any changes you make are less likely to be sustainable. So, take your time and write down how you feel about it.

● Step 3: CHOOSE YOUR CURRENT PERSPECTIVE (FRAME it)
Most of the times, we are looking at our world through our own personal ‘frame’. Just remember, YOU are the Creative Director of your entire life experience! Which means how that looks is dependent on the frame through which you view experiences in life.
Choose one of the abovementioned power tools to identify your current perspective. How is this perspective influencing the way you approach your issue or challenge? How would you describe it?

● Step 4: FLIP IT FOR A BETTER FUTURE
Trying on a new perspective is like trying on new shoes, you need to walk around in them for a bit and see how they feel! Using one of the previous powerful tools will help you considering a new perspective and then you can make choices or decisions that will most likely create a positive change in your life.
It’s easy to see any circumstance- like failing an exam/losing a job/breaking up a relationship- as bad things, wrong happenings or imperfections. This is a wonderful breeding ground for doubt. Now consider another perspective: all these situations are the adversaries in our life. They’re there to provoke us, challenge us, and keep life interesting. Contrary to appearances, these adversaries are always the catalyst for change and further growth.
If everything was planned and happened as we wished, we would probably wonder what is wrong here since we are used to thinking in contrasts: black and white, wrong and right.

Now, how does your problem or issue change when you come from a different perspective?