The Partner-based Development Approach… (part 2)

Posted on September 21, 2023 by Christelle Soto-Suarez, One of Thousands of Leadership Coaches on Noomii.

I started writing about this partner-based development approach when I compared the “vessel” we need to take us to the destination of our choice (instead of “being a leaf floating along the Flow of the River of Life”) to professional and personal development, saying that there are 3 types of development approaches available to us:
• The expert-based development approach;
• The self-based development approach; and
• The partner-based development approach.
I further explained what I meant by partner-based development approach in a follow-up article:
• It’s all about YOU!
• But you’re not on your own!
• You’re having a “true” 2-way interactive conversation
And I’m now expanding further on this partner-based development approach…
If you haven’t read my 2 previous articles about this partner-based approach, I suggest you check them out first here:
• Want to Lead your Life and Career more Intentionally? Here Are 3 Development Approaches to Consider!
• Want to Lead Your Life and Career more Intentionally? – The Partner-based Development Approach… (part 1)

So, what do I do with this partner-based development approach?
If you’ve read some of my other articles, or have been interested in different forms of development, you may think that this partner-based approach is very similar to life coaching (which, by the way, is also known as executive coaching, leadership coaching, and more!).
And you’d be right!
Because I’m infusing life coaching principles and techniques into facilitated conversations…
I partner with you (feel free to replace the words “partner with you” with: help you, support you, empower you, be the catalyst for you…) to awaken your self-leadership so that you feel empowered (you’re empowering yourself, or you’re self-empowered) to lead your life and your career more intentionally – like being more intentional about:
• Your destination(s);
• How you get there;
• Dealing with obstacles along the way;
• Adding an additional stop because you saw something of interest and you wanted to check it out;
… Instead of “being a leaf floating along the Flow of the River of Life”…
This means that, together, we unlock your self-leadership abilities (skills, expertise, competencies) through interactive and reflective conversations that are based on you (your thoughts), around topics connected to your issues and goals…
… Creating one spark after another of new answers and ideas, shifted mindset, changed perspectives…
… Until there’re enough sparks to ignite the fire of your internal motivation (intrinsic drive, willpower) to start taking action…
… And then to keep the momentum of that burning fire going with your self-leadership to design, build and lead your life and career more Intentionally…

How to provide this partner-based development approach?
The methods and programs I list below are based on my vision for what I want to do with this partner-based approach – I’m sure others will have different options based on their visions!
My vision (for now), in a few words:
• Be the catalyst to empower yourself to design, build and lead your life and career (and be more intentional);
• Awaken your self-leadership through partnership and coaching-infused facilitated conversations;
• Centered around self-leadership, self-empowerment, and diversity of thoughts.
• In ways that are practical, suitable, adjusted to your availability, needs and wants, and that can be integrated into your work and life schedules.
My objectives are for you to leave a conversation with:
• At least some sparks (questions, insights, discoveries) about your self-leadership (in your life or career), about how you could maybe think differently, about some of your perspectives;
• A changed perspective on how to lead yourself, your life, and your career more intentionally;
• A shift from “igniting” some self-reflection (disrupting your “habitual” thinking process) to “creating momentum” for long-term self-leadership;
• The start of a conversation about “thinking differently about yourself and how you lead your life and career”, that you can continue with others (friends, family members, colleagues, managers, etc.).
So, how to bring you these coaching-infused facilitated conversations? Here are some of the methods that came up to me:
• Writings – providing you with a structure so you can have your own facilitated conversations based on coaching principles and techniques (instead of being “told” what steps to go through, or how to do something);
• Recorded versions of these writings – so you can have these coaching-infused facilitated conversations while doing something else, or if this is your preferred means of development;
• Online or in-person interactive and reflective conversations;
• Development programs structured around your needs (topics, availability, frequency…), integrating more or less life coaching within the structure; and
• Life coaching, executive coaching, leadership coaching – as workshops, or on a group or individual basis.
Wondering if you could have these same conversations with family members, friends, colleagues, or even managers?
Well, it all depends on:
• The flow of information: from you to the other person and back to you, or mostly from the other person to you?
• Are you being really listened to, or only listened to enough for the other person to reply to you?
• Are you given the space you need to develop, and express, your thoughts?
• Are you getting reflective comments back, or mostly advice?
• Are you “allowed” to be the “expert in you”?
If yes, then you’re having one of these interactive conversations that will “awaken” something in you, even if only a “spark”…

What are the benefits?
As this partner-based approach is based on infusing life coaching principles and techniques into facilitated conversations, I believe the benefits to be very similar to the benefits of life coaching:
• Establish and take action towards achieving goals;
• Take greater responsibility and accountability for actions and commitments;
• Increased self-reliance, self-confidence, self-empowerment, self-awareness, resilience, clarity;
• Gain more job and life satisfaction or work-life balance;
• Deeper level of learning and self-development;
• Safe place to open your mind to new perspectives and possibilities, to shift your mindset.
But I’d say that the partner-based approach offers additional benefits:
• A wider range of methods of providing this approach to very busy, often tense, if not stressed and overwhelmed, professionals who very often don’t have the time, the flexibility, the energy to go through a traditional coaching experience effectively;
• Option to start with only “sparks” of insights, self-discovery, new questioning of own self-leadership (and of the impacts on own life and others’);
• Adaptable to your level of interest: a few “sparks”, “igniting” the fire, or keeping the “fire going”…
Why those benefits?
Well, this is all to do with your “intrinsic motivation"– your drive, your willpower, your self-leadership…
Because you’re more likely to:
• Take action, make changes, do something you said you’d do;
• Persist, engage, improve your efficiency, develop your performance, be loyal and dedicated to your goal;
• To develop momentum;
… if “it” comes from within you!
Because it’s something you want to do for yourself, something that provides you with fulfillment and satisfaction, maybe even joy and happiness!
Think about the “Flow” concept:
The best moments in our lives are not the passive, receptive, relaxing times… The best moments usually occur if a person’s body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile. – Mihály Csíkszentmihályi
Note: Like everything else in life, the benefits you’d get are highly dependent on the specific program or method you selected, as well as your willingness to spend time and energy throughout the whole process (not just in attending conversations, but although in-between conversations!), to keep going even in the “down” times, and to hold yourself accountable…

What it isn’t
Knowing what this partner-based approach is one thing, but I think it’s also important to clarify what it isn’t about
• Providing you with guidance, advice, solution;
• Telling you how to fix whatever is “wrong”;
• Giving you advice on how to deal with issues or making decisions;
• Confirming your views and your opinions;
• Being a shoulder to cry on and be comforted by;
• Helping you with mental or psychological issues;
• Providing medical, mental, psychological, therapeutic, counseling nor any other services that require any form of licensing.

What’s next?
As I said in my previous articles on this partner-based development approach, this is something I’m still exploring – hoping that the bud (this idea of a partner-based approach) will continue to blossom to become a fully bloomed practice!
But, in the meantime, I’d love to hear back from you!
• What do you think of this partner-based approach to professional and personal development?
• What resonates the most with you in this approach? And why is that?
• What is this article inspiring you to do?
• What else could be done with this approach?

And now…
Want to get regular sparks of inspiration, motivation, and education about how to empower yourself and develop your self-leadership? Then subscribe to my Pistachio-Cassis Newsletter! You can also follow me on LinkedIn.
Want to know more about me and what I do? Then check out Pistachio-Cassis Coaching website!
And, finally, I’d love to hear from you if you have any feedback, suggestions, or anything else you want to tell me! – email me at christelle@pistachiocassis.com.

Disclaimer
The views and opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the writer.