Willing to Become Willing
Posted on February 18, 2023 by Bryan Yates, One of Thousands of Performance Coaches on Noomii.
You imagine a future version of you and your life that you're traveling towards. Maybe it includes you leaving the job you're in, getting a raise ....
You imagine a future version of you and your life that you’re traveling towards. Maybe it includes you leaving the job you’re in, getting a raise that actually reflects what your talents are worth, being more fit, feeling differently about yourself, less professional and personal chaos, more love and confidence, becoming a NASCAR driver, feeling more emotionally fulfilled, walking the red carpet, or starting your own business. You fill in the blank. You may even embrace your life today as great, but there’s still a future you whom you’re imagining.
We all do this fantasizing, this internal thought experiment. Some of us refuse to say it out loud. Sometimes we shut it down with a limiting thoughts like “this is just how it is” or “I could never get THAT kind of raise” or “I don’t have the skills/talent” or “It’ll be too hard.” I don’t know how that dialogue got there or who operationalized it in you, but it’s there. To say it out loud puts us on the hook. It opens us up to the possibility of failure and the pain of judgement.
When we realize how hard it’s going to be, we negotiate. We retreat into perfectionism, lying to ourselves with “I need XYZ to happen, then I can get started.” That perfectionism allows us to stay snug and comfy in our indecision.
Your future is a long journey somewhere down this dusty road. And it is going to be hard. You’ll run all the marathons, climb all the peaks, and ride all the miles to get there. When you get there, wherever that is, you may be frustrated to find that there’s no real finish line, no place where you’ll be able to confidently and comfortably tell yourself, “This is it. I’ve arrived. Everything will stay just like this from now on.”
Whether it’s 4 hours or 40 years from now, that future is going to find you. That’s the ONLY thing in life of which you can be certain. Everything else is conjecture, expectation, and fantasy. So, who do you want to have become when your future arrives?
From deep personal and professional experience, I can assure you that the first step is hardest one you’ll take in your journey…. and it’s not nearly as hard as you imagine. Here is one thought to help you breakthrough your confidence barrier when getting started is too much to process….
Be Willing to Become Willing.
That may be the biggest step you can take today.