Fear of Success
Posted on January 23, 2023 by Rael Eckenroed, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
Embrace success when you see it and enhance your strengths by building on the little successes that life provides.
FEAR OF SUCCESS
While you are waiting for an opportunity, it might be waiting on you to come to it. Get up and go get it!” – Yvonne Pierre
We are aware of fear of failure paralyzing us and making us unable to go for our dreams. Sometimes we have failed before and therefore we do not want to try again.
Another fear to become familiar with is fear of success. When you have failed many times that you are afraid to succeed. OR you are so used to your status quo that you fear the unknown, even when the unknown has the potential to change your life for better.
Success might mean that you leave your house, home, your family, your neighborhood, and your friends. It might mean that you leave your comfort zone. The thought of this makes you stuck and unable to make the decision. Then the opportunity passes and goes to someone else.
This happens with many women as you go to your friends and family members for advice and they tell you, “No, please don’t do that, it is too much”. They fill your head with what ifs? They convince you to not take the plunge, “you will lose too much time”. What if you pursue that, by the time you finish you will be too old to have children????.
They will remind you of the biological clock even though you are not in a committed relationship. They will tell you to wait – a man will appear, and you may be out there on your own – they tell you. Or why not get a child while you are still able to do that – “don’t pursue that career dream” you will end up alone.
You are timid and don’t trust your judgement because as girls you were not raised to believe in yourself or to be trusted to make big decisions. These were done for you by your father and brothers, and so as an adult you find it difficult to make major decisions and to take risks. You prefer safety and not rock the boat.
I believe that you are better off listening to you and your inner self. Your conviction, your desires, and your long-term goals. When you stop listening to everyone else, you will find progress and you will not be afraid of success. You will see success and embrace it, not run away from it.
You can sabotage your own success if you do the following.
You quit when your goal is in sight – hold on to the finish line.
Recognize self-destructive behaviors that may make success impossible. This includes things like playing small, not accepting praise, downplaying achievements so that others do not feel bad or not to look flashy or boastful, avoiding being center of attention when you clearly deserve it
When you procrastinate and you are overthinking sending that email asking for promotion, you procrastinate sending that letter to the mail for that job offer, making that application for further studies, or you are taking your sweet time to submit that project report.
Some people hide their fear of success in perfectionism. You are working hard and keeping the bar very high, but by holding that bar too high, you fail to reach it, ending in disappointment and you give up. Instead, do make sure your goals are realistic and attainable.
“Be the type of girl that climbs the ladder wrong by wrong.” – Mae West
