Starting Over
Posted on January 23, 2023 by Rael Eckenroed, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.
Starting over after relationship break up is scary, but it is just the beginning. Be encouraged because you can survive this period.
“If you ever get a chance to go it alone. Walk alone, travel alone, lie alone, dance alone just for a while. If you ever get the chance, learn who you are when the world is not demanding you be one way or another. When you get the chance, know that the opportunity to walk alone, even for a bit, is a rare gift, one that will hand you insight that can change the course of your life.” – Brianna Wiest
Some people will tolerate abuse and name calling rather than calling it quits in a marriage. You have been able to quit. It is easier to stay, more difficult to say enough is enough, and you have been able to do that. The challenge now is being alone.
Friends disappear for reasons you do not understand. Maybe they do not know how to handle it, what to say to you, or they think you need space. Do not blame them. It is not about them; it is about you. Keep your focus on you.
Work on yourself. It is easy to feel like you want to go back, because it is lonely, and you had memories together. You have kids. Maybe you are looking at old photos or you hear familiar music that remind you of him. And you miss him. It’s normal. Afterall, he has been part of your life for a long time.
It will get better. Look hard at yourself and decide what you deserve. Are you better with him or without him? Do you want to go back? Some people put conditions before going back, I have been there too, hoping that this time things would be better. Different. It got worse, not better after going back – my experience.
It is all up to you. You are the only one who knows where the shoe pinches.
Being single is not the worst thing that can happen to you. Think about it. You could be sick or jobless, or in an accident, or worse. It may turn out to be the best thing that happened to you. Plenty of testimonials from women out there.
Feelings of guilt, loneliness, and regret are not going to disappear immediately. You were in a relationship for a long time. Give yourself time to heal.
This is not time to meet new people, find new friends, and invite people over to your house to hang out. You do not need any pity parties. This is a time to reflect.
Go out of course, have fun, visit the sick, volunteer, play with kids, be busy, but at the end of the day, be by yourself and reflect on your situation. Look at the pros and cons and learn to forgive yourself daily.
Have a gratitude journal and make entries daily about those things that you are grateful for in your life. Have a list of daily affirmations where you remind yourself how great you are and list your achievements over the years. Starting Over is hard, but it is doable. Seek the help of a Coach.
“When a woman rises up in Glory, her energy is magnetic, and her sense of possibility is contagious”. – Marianne Williamson
