You have to Behave Better to Feel Better
Posted on November 27, 2022 by Corey Jenkins, One of Thousands of Executive Coaches on Noomii.
You can't go to therapy, take medication, or read a book to change. You'll feel better when you do things in a new way.
Psychologically and emotionally speaking, what a lot of people aren’t aware of is that we can’t think ourselves into feeling better. We must behave into feeling better. But what drives our behavior? Our thoughts. And what drives our thoughts? Our belief systems. Therefore, we need to identify our belief systems and thoughts, eliminate the unhelpful, antiquated ones and replace them with new ideas from our highest consciousness. I call this “Awareness” and you can read my article here on Noomii called “Awareness is More Powerful than Knowledge” to learn more. Then, we practice the new behavior matching the new belief system that we’ve consciously selected. Here are some examples:
1. Fear. The opposite of fear is faith, or willingness. What do you want that you’re not doing because of fear (i.e.: change job, get into/out of relationship, travel to a new country, learn a new activity, etc.)? For years I did not surf because I was afraid of swimming in the ocean. Well into my forties, I needed to take a basic swim lesson as a first step before learning to surf well. I resisted this for a long time before having a coach take me “back to the basics.” Shortly after I was more comfortable in the ocean and today, I feel wonderful when I am surfing!
2. Resentment. Also disguised as anger, disappointment and compulsive thinking, resentment is like drinking poison and hoping the other person will suffer. Who is living in your head rent-free? The behaviors that are the opposite of resentment are tolerance, compassion, and non-judgement. I will show you the spiritual practice combined with the program to shift your behavior into freedom from these resentments.
3. Selfishness & self-centeredness. Nobody likes this one at first, but humans are selfish by default until a time in their life when they consciously work toward integrating their lives with the whole. Once aware of this, and willing to change, the opposite of self-centeredness is “other” centeredness. You will feel better when you stop worrying so much about your own affairs and offer your time and energy to somebody that is less fortunate than you. As a participant in my coaching you will volunteer your time (not your money because that’s a shortcut) and put yourself in places to be helpful to others.
I will help you identify old beliefs and unhelpful thought patterns, resulting in your current feelings. We’ll evaluate them all in an inventory process. Some you may keep—likely you have some great mental assets! However, those that are no longer serving you or deemed to be out of alignment with your authentic desire, will be discarded. I will coach and support you through the transition to your new behavior and new feelings.
