You have two hands. One to help yourself, the second to help others.

Posted on August 25, 2022 by Dr Rigobert Kefferputz, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

I don’t understand why we always sell ourselves short — as if we were undeserving of help in the first place. When you’re in the moment, asking for help can feel weak, like you can’t handle things for yourself. like you’ve lost control, and that is uncomfortable.

A Masterful Retreat is in itself a Victory
But it just means that you’re taking a step back — it doesn’t mean you are giving up. If anything, you are prioritizing yourself by asking for help. Taking a step back might help you take a look at the bigger picture. If anything, there will always be life challenges, so sit back and get comfortable in the disruption. Remember, when you ask for help, you are permitting yourself to take care of yourself. It’s similar to the instruction to put your oxygen mask on before putting it on someone else’s. You help yourself, and that’s a good thing.

Help me Help you
This is especially true in the day-to-day tasks of your home and family life. If you are a burnt-out mess because you keep going for everyone else, and have a belief that you have to continuously be strong for your partner and everyone else, over and over again, you aren’t doing anyone a favor. It drains your energy, it is stressful, it hardens your soul, and in the end, you become unavailable to yourself and the loved ones around you. Asking for help ends up helping everyone.

Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I do that every day. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. It shows you have the courage to admit when you don’t know something, and to learn something new.
- Barack Obama

The Price of Help
No one likes to have an IOU hanging over their head. Though the definition of being indebted to someone may also surpass money, goods, or services to someone. Being indebted can also be a matter of feeling grateful for someone’s help, having a moral obligation of appreciation, and welcoming the opportunity to return the favor.

People Love to Help
As humans, we are innately social mammals. You cannot take the connection out of us. It’s in us. By asking someone for help you are making them feel important, trusted, and valued. Especially when you know you will need help for major events in your life, make a list of those who can help you. Your friends and family want to contribute to your life, so let them in. The greatest value in relationships is the ability to be vulnerable and show up unapologetically yourself.

Know your limits
Asking for help is also a great lesson in knowing your limitations. You aren’t made for everything, you have your strengths and your weaknesses, own them, and hone them. Remember, it’s not the load that breaks your back but it’s the way you carry it. It’s a lot easier when someone helps you carry that load.

Practice makes Improvement
Ask for help one step at a time. Consistently, it will get easier, and the more you become comfortable asking specifically for what you need, the easier it is for others to help you. Start with small things if necessary, and if you need to practice asking for help, then make it a part of your practice.

Final Thoughts
Accomplishments are made against the backdrop of a silent army of helpers. Every book, movie, or award rings in acknowledgment of all the people that have supported the protagonist in his or her enterprise. The world wouldn’t be what it is if it wasn’t for our ability to help one another and be willing to accept said help.