The Truth About Millennial Burnout and What You Can Do

Posted on May 30, 2022 by Jenna Rykiel, One of Thousands of Business Coaches on Noomii.

TL:DR – The Millennial generation was built to burnout. Which means that prevention and recovery are that much more important for each of us to prioritize and, unfortunately, it doesn’t happen overnight. Find out more about how social and ideological pressures unique to our generation have set us up to burn out;

Relationship to Technology
Relationship to Productivity
Passion Ideologies
The Pressures of Parent Olympics

Millennials became the largest generation in the labor force in 2016 and the majority are experiencing burnout. Though burnout is not unique to Millennials, there are unique challenges and descriptors that apply to this generation that didn’t impact generations before. As a Millennial myself, I found the research to be spot on, which was both a relief and a dagger. It’s depressing to know that the cards are stacked against us. We’ve been built to burnout. Which means that prevention and recovery are that much more important for each of us to prioritize and, unfortunately, doesn’t happen overnight.

But it was also a relief to read about variables and ideologies more common in the Millennial generation that have exacerbated burnout because it made me feel that we’re not alone in this struggle. It’s not just me— it’s all of us, and there are some really helpful hints as to how we got here and what we can do to work and live differently.

Though burnout is a very individual experience, Millennials grew up with social pressures and ideologies that got us to where we are today.

So what is Millennial burnout? A Millennial is anyone born between 1981 and 1996 (ages 26 to 41 in 2022). Generations are defined by a range of factors, which may include demographics, attitudes, historical events, and popular culture, among other things.

Burnout is when someone experiences total physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion as a result of stress. According to World Health Organization, burnout is characterized by “feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion; increased mental distance from one’s job, or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one’s job; and reduced professional efficacy.”

Deloitte’s Workplace Burnout Survey found that 84% of Millennials feel burnout in their jobs (compared to 77% of all professionals) and nearly half of Millennials say they’ve left a job due to feeling burnt out (compared to 42% of all respondents). Though this type of stress is not unique to Millennials, the Millennial generation is particularly susceptible to burnout for several reasons defined by attitudes and popular culture within the generation. The reasons I found most worthwhile to identify and understand for myself was our unique relationship to technology, productivity, passion ideologies, and unrealistic expectations for parenting.

Relationship to Technology

A recent study found that the leading cause of Millennial burnout is their unique relationship to technology. Though Millennials have a more positive opinion of how technology is affecting their lives than any other generation, over half of Millennials (56%) surveyed feel that technology or media overload give them a stressful life. A similar percentage (55%) are stressed due to the pressure of social media.

Millennials are the first generation to grow up with technology always at their fingertips and while this has made us tech savvy, it has also created a world where we’re always plugged in. We’re constantly bombarded with notifications, messages, and alerts. This means that we’re never unplugged from work and can always be reached.

Without proper individual, team, and client boundaries, we can overcommit as a way to prove that we are dedicated and care about our work. This then sets an expectation for others that we are always reachable, even when it’s in our best interest to unplug from work. It becomes the norm to get email notifications on our phone (or watch) and to be distracted from family at any hour in the evening.

We love technology for the benefits that it has provided to help us keep in touch with family and friends, but like everything, it needs moderation and constraints— especially social media. We are the first generation to grow up with social media, which has contributed to a sense of anxiety and isolation that leads to increased rates of burnout.

Limiting social media has been linked to increasing wellbeing. A 2018 University of Pennsylvania study found that reducing social media use to 30 minutes a day resulted in a significant reduction in levels of anxiety, depression, loneliness, sleep problems, and FOMO (fear of missing out). When we’re innocently scrolling on social media, we’re not only distracted, we’re consciously or subconsciously comparing our lives to everyone on our newsfeed. This distorts reality as we see more positive experiences posted from others, while what we experience in our own lives is a mixed bag. It gives the impression that we’re the only one struggling in life and lowers our self-esteem and confidence.

Social media creates a constant pressure to be seen as successful and happy, which leads Millennials to feel like we are never good enough. The internet makes it easy to compare ourselves to others, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy.

Relationship to Productivity

Another area of life that can leave us feeling particularly inadequate is our tendency to measure up our worth with productivity. There’s always more work to be done and as a generation that has grown up with constant focus on productivity, optimization, and efficiency, we are experiencing burnout at much higher rates.

It’s common for people, including myself, to measure their self-worth each day by their productivity. How many times have you said, “I didn’t have a great day, it just wasn’t productive”? At first glance, this may seem harmless, but productivity is subjective and vague, which means we’re measuring ourselves up against a moving or invisible target. This leads us to lack a sense of worth more often than not. As mentioned before, there will always be more work at the end of the day, which can make us feel unproductive no matter how much we accomplished.

If we expect that we meet a certain standard of productivity each day, it means that if we’re not working at 100%, we’re somehow failing ourselves and our teams. This can hinder us from feeling worthy throughout the week. Self-compassion is often lacking from the equation.

The Millennial generation is a generation that has been shaped by optimization and efficiency. Capitalism has always been around, but it feels like it’s been on steroids over the last two decades. Everything that we do has been optimized to be faster, more convenient, and less time consuming so we can do and produce more.

We’ve optimized how we eat, sleep, exercise, read, and watch sports. There are so many apps and gadgets that make our lives more convenient and allow us to do more. But what do we do once we conveniently put the food in the air fryer? We answer emails or start a load of laundry or do any of the myriad of tasks that we need to get done.

You would think that since we’ve optimized our entire life, we’d feel a sense of accomplishment in our productivity, but it has the opposite effect. When we do more in less time, we find that there’s always more to do so we keep working. We think that if we just get the next thing done, we’ll be able to rest and when we get that thing done, we realize there’s always one more thing.

The general principle in operation is one you might call the “efficiency trap.” Rendering yourself more efficient—either by implementing various productivity techniques or by driving yourself harder—won’t generally result in the feeling of having “enough time,” because, all else being equal, the demands will increase to offset any benefits. Far from getting things done, you’ll be creating new things to do. – Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals

Millennials are burning out from the unrealistic expectations we have for ourselves to do it all. And it’s not just unrealistic expectations to do it all, there are also stressful expectations to BE it all.

Passion Ideologies

Another first for the Millennial generation is the ideologies we were fed around finding work that you’re passionate about. This may seem inspiring and harmless on the surface, but it’s created existential crises for so many.

The majority of us either haven’t found our passion or haven’t figured out how to make money from what we’re passionate about and society has made this a problem. We feel a sense of failure working at a job that feels like work. This creates additional stress and anxiety as we spend energy worrying about how much time we’re wasting in a job that we’re not “passionate” about, meanwhile feeling inadequate because we aren’t sure what our passions are.

There was a story we were fed about going to college in order to land that dream job and for most Millennials, that never really came to fruition. Instead we’re working jobs that feel like work and we can’t stop working to figure out our passion because we have to pay off the heaps of college debt. I believe this partly explains why Millennials change jobs more than any other generation.

We’ve been told that if you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life and we’re chasing that promise. Millennial turnover is said to cost the U.S. economy an estimated $30.5 billion annually. While I support people who find work they’re passionate about, I hope it’s understood that the majority of people are working to make money so that they can use that money as a tool to do things that bring them joy— and that’s more than okay!

It’s important to note that within the backdrop of all other unique challenges the Millennial generation has faced, there are incredibly debilitating financial challenges. Based on the most recent U.S. Census Bureau data, the average salary for a Millennial is $47,034, which is an estimated 20% lower, in real terms, than the average salary that a Baby Boomer had at the same age.

It shouldn’t be surprising to also hear that Millennials are in deeper debt than generations before, mostly due to the soaring costs of education over the last few decades. This financial reality, more debt with less income than generations before, is an incredible amount of added stress for Millennials.

The Pressures of Parent Olympics

Lots of Millennials are now parents and, although I’m not a parent myself, I’d be remiss if I didn’t call out the incredibly demanding and never-ending Parent Olympics that many people have been thrown into. Parent Olympics is a term I’ve decided to use to characterize the social pressures that are put on parents to win the gold medal of parenting. Most of the wonderful parents in my life don’t consciously know or want to be competing, but we’re living in a world with information and activity overload— not to mention that pesky thing called social media— so it’s near impossible to sit on the sidelines.

There are articles, books, documentaries, movies, shows, and countless other mediums (including in-laws) where parents are getting directly or indirectly fed information about what it means to be a “good” parent. There are judgements about everything from when you start feeding your kids solids to potty training to the books and activities your child is exposed to. While there might be medical or scientific insights that are valuable to keeping kids safe and healthy, there is copious amounts of information and not all the information is aligned, which can be exhausting.

Moms and dads are constantly questioning whether they’re doing the “right” thing when, I think we can all agree, there is no one right answer. But we’re made to believe there is a right way to do things and pressure is added to parents to figure out what that one thing is. This includes family decisions on whether both parents continue working. While the Baby Boomer generation was the turning point for women in the workforce, that number has continued to grow, where 72% of Millennial women are working and a majority of two parent households are navigating both parents working. This adds a stressful dynamic to both parents, especially if household responsibilities tend to fall on one more than the other.

As I mentioned before, social media and the evils of comparison also wreak havoc in the parenting arena. We can look at social media and see all the fun activities that our peers are exposing their kids to and feel a sense of inadequacy that our kids aren’t having the same experiences. There are subtle messages declaring that if your child isn’t involved in soccer, dance, swimming, art, piano, and language learning, you’re stifling their ability to find what they’re passionate about. And remember, they need to find what they’re passionate about so they’ll never work a day in their life.

This isn’t to say that exposing kids to lots of activities is a bad thing— the point I’m making is that parents feeling pressured to avoid judgements and ridicule about their parenting choices creates an environment where it’s impossible to feel content or satisfied. Instead of competing in the Parent Olympics, each family should run their own race, with confidence knowing they’re doing what’s best for their family. Raising a family is hard enough without the added stress and pressure to compete.

And how does this apply to burnout? No matter how much we try to compartmentalize our lives, all parts of our identity are interwoven into one body— a body that carries the stress of getting the kids ready for daycare into the work meeting and carries the stress of the workday into the sometimes hectic bedtime routine. Burnout impacts how we show up as both an employee and a parent.

Now what do we do?

If you’re a Millennial like me, I hope that some of this helps you to put words to the sometimes unspoken pressures that we’re being exposed to everyday (and since childhood) that have been slowly cumulating over time and wearing us down. But if you’ve read this far — and wow, I’m impressed, because I usually don’t drag on this long but I was on quite a soapbox — I want you to walk away feeling like you know how to support yourself against the odds.

If you feel like you or your team are struggling with Millennial burnout, consider some of the tips below to reverse the trend and choose to work and live differently.

Take a break from your devices.

One of the best ways to combat Millennial burnout is to take a break from your device. Step away from your phone, laptop, and tablet for a few hours each day. Spend time outside, read a book, or talk to friends and family in person. Disconnecting from technology will help you relax and recharge.

Did the part about social media resonate with you? Take a vacation from social media. Consider deleting one, two, or all from your device and make a commitment to stay away for an extended time period. I think you’ll find it a relief to separate from the constant updates.

Set boundaries.

Another way to reduce the stress of Millennial burnout is to set clear boundaries. If you have too many commitments or are always responding to messages and notifications, it’s time to establish some limits for yourself and others. Decide what hours you’re available for work and stick to those constraints. Communicate clearly with coworkers and supervisors about what you need and how they can respect the boundaries you’re setting at work.

Boundaries aren’t just helpful at work, they also work wonders at home. Overcommitting to social events can be just as draining, especially for us introverts. Saying no is a powerful tool for protecting your energy. If you aren’t 100% excited about the event, do yourself a favor and say no so that you aren’t resentful towards yourself and the host.

Practice self-awareness and compassion.

Identify what’s going on and understand the unique factors that make it especially hard for Millennials to step away and regulate their work-life balance. Practicing noticing moments of unnecessary self-imposed pressure or feelings of inadequacy that are fueled by insecurities around productivity or how we’re comparing ourselves to others.

Look at those moments without judgement. When we’re able to look at how elements are manifesting and remain nonjudgemental, we’re practicing true self-compassion. It’s an awareness and acceptance that we are all humans doing our best with what we have. We’re not broken and we don’t need fixing.

Incremental tweaks.

What we need more than anything is a little bit of tweaking — very small, incremental shifts in our habits and thought patterns that help us to rewire our defaults. Our defaults are all the things discussed above — a tendency to grab our phones and scroll through social media, check our email after hours, worry about if we got enough done today, compare ourselves to other parents and question whether we’re doing enough.

Don’t think about how you can do a complete 180 because that will be overwhelming and unrealistic. Think about how you can move 5% closer to recovery.

Burnout doesn’t happen overnight. These habits and ideologies have been slowly building over a lifetime, which means that burnout recovery is not a quick process either. What does your 5% shift look like today or this week? A few examples include;

Setting an evening rule that your phone goes on silent after 7pm
Blocking off time for lunch and committing to not doing work during that hour
Drinking an extra glass of water each day.

These incremental changes are small and manageable. They also add up over time and can impact the way you work and feel in the long run.

Make the commitment today to recognize, reverse, and build resilience to burnout by recognizing the unique factors of the Millennial generation that have led to the epidemic of burnout in our workforce.
Are you or your team struggling with burnout? I support individuals and teams to prevent burnout and find new ways to work that prioritize wellbeing.

Let’s talk about real change — schedule time using the link on my profile page.