Why Radical Self-Love and Acceptance?

Posted on May 04, 2022 by Michaela Hunte, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.

Some may look at the term radical self-love and self-acceptance and wonder, what does that mean? It is something that I think is important for a happy, healthy life and positive relationships. It is the understanding and awareness that you are enough! You are worthy just as you are and have everything you need already within you. It is being able to give yourself all the love, warmth, and respect that you deserve. It’s waking up every day and acknowledging that you are a beautiful, powerful soul. In all shapes, sizes, forms, abilities, you are perfect, you are enough, you are worthy, just as you are. It’s very easy to fall into the motion of relying on love and acceptance from the external world. These patterns do not serve us. When we rely on love and acceptance from others, it can leave us feeling low and unworthy when that love is not readily available. What if I told you that you can get even more love, affection, and respect that you desire and deserve, from yourself. You can have a life filled with love every day. Doesn’t that sound amazing? This can be your reality, all it takes is small steps, day by day. Therefore, practicing radical self-love and acceptance is a necessity. Once you enter that loving space, it amplifies your ability to give and receive love in the external world. Most importantly, it leaves space for you to expand, grow and step into your power. You will no longer spend time focusing on where to get that love fix, you’ll have plenty of love within you.

We all know someone who bounces from relationship to relationship, rarely spending time single. If this resonates with you, don’t worry! It is not always a disservice, sometimes we have many opportunities for healthy, loving relationships. It is perfectly fine to reach out and grab them when they present themselves. I simply invite you to think about how you feel when you are single. What drives you to into your relationships? What is it, if anything, that stops you from enjoying life as a single person? It is important to check in with yourself and be aware of your answers to these questions, to understand where you are on your self-love journey. So, it is less about being single and more about the reasons behind your avoidance of single life.

Your radical self-love and acceptance journey is of great importance when it comes to personal relationships. “If you can’t love yourself, how are you going to love somebody else?”. Very simply put, if you don’t give yourself the love, respect, and acceptance that you deserve, your ability to give and receive these qualities from others are greatly affected. Imagine that you have your own glass. When practicing radical self -love and acceptance, you are filling that glass. It is only when your own glass is overflowing that you can wholeheartedly give any of that love, respect, and acceptance to someone else. It is important to be able to give without taking away from your own glass, practicing radical self-love and acceptance is what will keep your glass full, while being able to share that love and acceptance with others. Another huge benefit of being able to fill your own glass is that when it is full, we no longer rely on others to fill it. Do you keep putting up with less than you deserve, simply because you are searching for something that you feel you’re lacking? If the answer to this question is yes, it may be time to focus on your own glass. Once your glass is overflowing, you will notice how your personal relationships change. You have all you need within you, therefor you will no longer deal with anyone that doesn’t serve you, for the sake of feeling loved, accepted, and respected. Equally, if you are not loving, accepting and kind to yourself, you are more likely to accept that same unacceptable behaviour from others. If you are not aware of your own worth, you will attract those who are just as unaware. When you are in a space of radical self-love and acceptance, you will be surprised to see the kind of people you begin to attract.

So, let’s look at some simple self-love and acceptance practices that you can include in your daily routine.

1: Spend a little bit of time each day writing down or speaking aloud, whichever feels right for you, things that you love about yourself. If this feels like too big of a task, you can start smaller, with things that you like about yourself. The aim of this practice is to bring your focus into amore positive space. When you begin acknowledging your likes, instead of your dislikes, your perspective shifts. These can be anything at all:

“I love my hair”

“I like my strength”

“I love my eyebrows”

“I like my kindness"

2: This exercise is like the one above. The slight difference is that now, instead of saying the things you like and love about yourself, you change the focus to the parts of yourself that you don’t love and accept. You take these parts and flip the narrative.

“I hate my hips, they’re too wide” becomes“ I love my hips, they are so beautiful”

“I dislike my lips, they’re too small” becomes“ I love my lips, they are mine, they are unique, they are perfect”

While this may feel strange at first, it is very important to change the language you use when speaking to or about yourself. The aim of this practice is to shift the negative perspectives you may have about yourself, bringing them into a positive light. The more you tell yourself something, the more you begin to believe it.

3: This last practice is daily affirmation. You can start off small and increase as time goes on and once again you can write or speak aloud. It’s simple, each affirmation starts with “I am…” and it is followed by a positive, encouraging self-description.

“I am powerful”

“I am beautiful”

“I am worthy”

Once again this may feel strange at first, you may not yet believe these things to be true, but as mentioned previously, the more you tell yourself something, the more you believe it! Language has a massive impact on our self-perception. These exercises are here to guide you as acknowledge its impact and use it to empower yourself.

When practicing radical self-love and acceptance, your confidence, sense of self -worth and self-esteem improves, along with your general mood. It is a journey, which ebbs and flows, it won’t always feel easy, but it is so necessary and worth every second. The profound positive changes that come with this practice is extraordinary, it is liberating, it is empowering. Therefore, I’m spreading the word; it is time for radical self-love and acceptance, will you join me on this journey?