Rebuilding Trust

Posted on March 07, 2022 by Mieke Stapelberg, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

It’s challenging to leave your partner after an affair. It’s not as simple to walk away from a relationship you have invested considerable time and devotion into. Despite growing weary of constant heartache throughout the process, forgiveness allows us to move forward towards healing instead of holding onto bitterness forever. Forgiveness begins with being kind toward ourselves first while allowing room for growth and space to eventually be kind to our spouse. You so desperately want this feeling of betrayal to be erased, but it simply can’t. It’s happened, and there is no turning back. What lies ahead of you now is work. Your life will likely look completely different moving forward, and your entire perception of marriage, family, and sex will change. Letting go of hope for future reconciliation seems impossible right now. And this is ok. Taking small steps every day toward healing helps tremendously. The decision to rebuild trust requires tremendous courage, strength, discipline, and perseverance.

It’s important to grieve your relationship. Grieving brings with it healing. Grieving symbolizes the end of something that once was. There is no magic formula or manual on the best ways to handle loss because grieving comes in many forms.

It starts with accepting your sadness.

Sadness is filled with feeling, with life, and healing is about embracing your sadness so you can eventually make room for a new beginning.

Many relationships have successfully moved past infidelity and have continued to grow deeper. Remember that healing and forward motion are crucial for you and your family during these challenging moments. But resist pushing it. Instead, ask for assistance from a qualified professional who can help you process your feelings and develop objectives to help you thrive rather than just survive.