It's Not Your Fault!
Posted on September 27, 2021 by Deanna Marie Coaching, One of Thousands of Relationship Coaches on Noomii.
Alcoholics have a tendency to blame us for things that go wrong in their life. I want to tell all partners that it has nothing to do with you...
Are you tired of being told everything is all your fault?
Alcoholics love to blame us for everything.
Even the stupidest things.
Front door open? Our fault that the heat bill is so high.
Out of lightbulbs? How could we not have bought extras?
Milk spoiled? Don’t you ever read the milk carton date?
Missed the garbage man? Why didn’t you remind me that EVERY SUNDAY is garbage night. -Our fault.
Oyvay! We can never win.
When we are repeatedly told that everything is our fault, our brain starts telling us, maybe it is our fault.
We begin to believe we need to do better, read the milk carton, buy the lightbulbs, set the reminder for the garbage…..
It’s so freaking stupid.
But this is what happens.
We get so beaten down by being criticized for all that we are not doing that we either believe it or try to “do better” next time.
Anything, to keep them happy, to keep peace.
I am here to tell you. STOP DOING THAT! It is not your FAULT!
It’s ok that you do or don’t do whatever your alcoholic thinks you should or shouldn’t do.
You have the right to live your life in the way you see fit.
They get to do whatever the heck they want right?
So stop walking on eggshells.
You know its not your fault, so don’t let them blame you anymore.
You have to start taking care of yourself.
You have to find your voice.
You need to find the courage to say “no more” to your alcoholic.
If you are ready to turn this blame game around, I can show you how.
I can teach you how to take back your power and build your confidence when your partner starts pointing fingers.
I can teach you simple strategies to stop believing his accusation and start believing in you.
If you are ready for change, I am here to help.
