10 Steps to Imperfect Success

Posted on December 12, 2020 by Bennie Fowler, One of Thousands of Leadership Coaches on Noomii.

I called my book Silver Spoon: The Imperfect Guide to Success. Why? Because I’m imperfect. Life is imperfect. People are imperfect. But that doesn’t mean we can’t be successful. With hard work, dedication, and determination, we can succeed, and have lots of fun along the way.

Here are ten tips I’ve picked up from my own career and from the outstanding mentors I’ve met along the way. Put them into practice and they can help to fuel your own imperfect success.

#1: Continually Rediscover Your Passion

Discover what you love and can do better than anyone else. This is your wheelhouse and focusing on it can transform you into a superstar. Keep searching for your passion even after you think you’ve found it. My friend Seth
Minter, who works with some of the best athletes in the world on improving their footwork, is constantly reminding me that the universe is huge. It will provide new situations if you are open to them. You can never think you have all the answers.

#2: Never Stop Learning

There are so many opportunities to learn and grow in the world. New people, new places, new perspectives. Take as many of these opportunities as you can.
Read widely and look for fresh ideas to expand your understanding of yourself and the world around you. Keep evolving and improving. You never know where learning will take you and what doors it will open.

#3: Respect Yourself

Wherever you go, you are teaching people how to treat you. If you respect yourself, you are telling them that you deserve to be respected. If you don’t respect yourself, why should they respect you?

When you step out on the field or into the boardroom, behave like you belong there. Remember what my friend Desyree says: how people value themselves determines how successful they will be. So, trust your intelligence and your abilities, and don’t let doubts hold you back.

#4: See Setbacks as Assets

We all face adversity, regardless of our backgrounds. Not a person on this planet can call themselves truly successful until they’ve met challenges head-on and come through them. Until you’ve been tested, how do you know what you’re capable of?

Those who succeed are those who see setbacks as an opportunity to learn more and improve. They don’t waste time wallowing in self-doubt or pity; they use failure to motivate them to get better.

#5: Set Specific Goals

If you don’t know what you want, how will you know when you arrive? Goals are markers that let you know how you’re progressing and how far you still have to travel. Sometimes you may need to adapt your goals. Or you may reach them and need to set new ones. Don’t let that stop you from setting them.

Set big goals but also little goals and measure the progress you make in reaching them. And reevaluate your goals from time to time. Are they still challenging enough? Can you reach even higher? Challenge yourself.

#6: Choose Your Friends Wisely.

Jim Rohn famously said that you’re the average of the five people with whom you spend the most time. Surround yourself with people who will support you but also challenge you. Look for a diverse circle of friends—people who think differently about the world than you do who can open you up to ideas you wouldn’t have otherwise considered.

Seek out people who are willing to challenge your assumptions and perspective on the world and force you to look at life from a different angle. Find mentors and admirable people to emulate. You are the corporate leader of your life; employ friendships that will advance the corporation.

#7: Practice Discipline

There are a lot of talented people in the world. The ones who truly succeed are the ones who combine talent with the practice of discipline. I say “practice” because no one has fully mastered discipline. The second you think you have mastered it is the moment that you should realize you still have a lot of work to do. Self-mastery never ends, so make it an enjoyable process. Keep a journal. Meditate. Visualize. Speak positive affirmations. These are all tools of self-discovery.

#8: Help Others

None of us has gotten to where we are without someone’s help. I’ve had great mentors helping me to hone every aspect of my game. I’m a much better football player for the support of Dr. Rick Perea, Seth Minter, and dozens of fellow professionals who have led by example and opened me up to new aspects of the sport.

When we understand that we’ve benefited from the help of others, we have what I would consider an obligation to find ways to help those who need it. It’s another way to learn and improve as a person.

#9: Train Body and Mind

Just as you work to build your strength, speed, and flexibility, you need to train your brain. Learn to quiet your mind by sweeping out negative thoughts and replacing them with positive, uplifting thoughts. You can do this using tools such as meditation, visualization, and journaling.

Ultimately, you should be as relaxed in the arena—whatever arena you play in—as you are in your daily life. Training your mind relaxes your muscles, fosters confidence, and leads to outstanding performance, even in the face of big challenges.

#10: Work Before You Play

“Work before you play and all your life you will thrive.” That’s what my mom always told my brother and me. “You can’t just go out there and have fun all the time. You have to put in the work. The work is what makes fun and games so enjoyable.”

Sports is a business—no one knows this better than an NFL player. To succeed in business, it’s essential to prepare for optimum performance. But it’s also a game. We play sports for fun, right? That’s the way it should be. Work before you play, but don’t forget to play.

This article was adapted from Silver Spoon: The Imperfect Guide to Success, written by Bennie Fowler. Bennie Fowler is a six-year veteran of the NFL who spent four years with the Denver Broncos and an in-demand speaker trained through the NFL Speakers Bureau, who was a member of the Super Bowl 50 championship team in 2016.