NAVIGATING CHANGE IN 2020

Posted on September 23, 2020 by Emmanuelle Stathopoulos-Arnold, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

What a year 2020 has been so far! It has brought about so many changes good and bad and has forced us to change our ways. From the way we work to the way we socialize or communicate with our loved ones, most of us have had to adjust to our new COVID and financial reality as best we could and it’s not over yet.

My 2020
Personally, it has affected the way I work and the kind of services I offer. Being high risk myself I couldn’t afford to continue the same way professionally. I can no longer offer Home Space Evaluations and Interior Design Psychology services. I cannot come to your place and go through the rooms with you, examining what doesn’t work for you and why, and how it could be improved. We cannot sit down over a cup of coffee and have that relaxed conversation so as you can tell me all about it and show me around.

Can’t it be done virtually? Practically and to a certain degree yes. Yet the quality of my services wouldn’t be the same. This is why I decided to focus on my online Coaching services and put the Interior Design Psychology Consultation services in second place. I can and will still be offering them to you but as an added and optional service, if and when needed.

I was already offering Coaching for Life Changes & Transitions before, so our new 2020 reality kind of fit right in! Changing the focus of my services required a change of business name as the old name ‘Your Place & You’, was no longer appropriate. This is how ‘Navigating Change Your Way’ was created and that’s where I am at right now.

We’re all in this together
Our lives have changed to more or lesser degrees and we’re facing an uncertain future while doing the best we can. The nice thing about changes is that they offer us a great opportunity to improve things or change them altogether. They allow us to change direction, shift gears, slow down or accelerate according to what’s needed and what’s made possible or even obsolete. Whatever the case may be, Change is taking us to unknown territories and that can be both scary and exciting! It is what we make of it and what we can make of it can turn out to be the best thing for us. The only thing is we cannot know that while swimming in the dark, and that can cause a lot of stress and anxiety, worries and concerns.

Change Navigator
To become a good Change Navigator, we need to first of all know our ship. What we’re made of, what we’re capable of, what our weaknesses are. We need to know our destination, our exact position in the present time, and where we want to get in the future. Quite often though we simply don’t know what or where our destination is, we need to build our trust in our abilities and go on an exploration adventure.

Most people find this scary or uncomfortable, especially when older. We have accumulated enough baggage to weigh us down, we have learned too much for our own good and are less open to possibilities. Our rational mind has become more exclusive than inclusive of options. We don’t take new risks that easily. The cost of failure becomes higher or so we believe. We’re more attached to things, people and places, more stuck in our habits and patterns of behavior.

Nothing to lose
Having said that it all depends on what one needs to leave behind to gain a new footing elsewhere, in a different situation and reality. If you come from a place where you have lost it all, things are easier. Having nothing more to lose sets one free to focus on what’s in front of them. Too many loose ends, too much ‘stuff’, too many ties, too many things established, make the process of Change much more difficult and scary as the risk increases and it involves more hard decisions and choices.

Traveling light
To travel well and comfortably one needs to travel light or in first class. That relates to both financial factors as well as specific life circumstances. You need to be free of too much baggage, burden and fears. You need to have little to lose or to be prepared and OK to possibly lose considerably. When living from pay-check to pay-check it is hard to be free and comfortable. When you are tied to too many responsibilities as well. When your mind is filled with negativity and impossibility it makes it rather improbable because you cannot even see the open doors in front of your very nose.

Navigating Change skills
Navigating Change requires resilience and flexibility, creativity and commitment, consistency and dedication, but most of all an open mind and courage. When you don’t have the means, you need to put more time in and more work. When you do have the means, you still need to be able to think proactively, think forward, and what that Change might look like.

If you give up you must be prepared to fall at sea and drown, knowing there might be nobody there to save you, so giving up is not an option. If you’re not sure, stay where you are with whatever consequences that may entail. Good planning is of massive value but isn’t everything. After all, the trademark of Change is the knack of turning things upside down. Think COVID…

If your ship catches fire you need to either be able to put the fire out or jump at sea and swim or even get on another boat if lucky. If the island you arrive at is hostile or uninhabitable, you must be prepared to fight or leave and search for other lands. Once on land, you need to deal with things step by step as you face them and learn more about them. You may need to learn a new ‘language’, new skills to survive. You may need to adjust to new ways of doing things, new ways of thinking, and perceiving things.

Emotional aspects of unwanted Change
Change isn’t just about the practical and material, the emotional aspect of change is the one most of us have the hardest time to deal with. Unwanted change especially in the form of a sudden loss of a beloved, a divorce, loss of a job, home or health, or any other aspect of our established reality can be very hard to handle.

Both grief and stress can make it more difficult to see and think clearly to be able to make any positive and successful choices and decisions. It is crucial to give ourselves the advantage of a calm and clear mind to be able to make a good plan of action to achieve our goals.

Fear on the other hand can immobilize us, cause us to slip in unhealthy or undesirable habits or patterns of behavior. It can fog and narrow our vision field thus make us unable to see the things that could be useful or helpful to us. Prolonged stress and anxiety can lead to feelings of depression and this can slow us down, make us feel hopeless and helpless.

Desired Change challenges
Even wanted and less dramatic life changes and transitions may cause significant emotional turmoil, strong enough to diminish our cognitive abilities, and keep us stuck in inertia and indecision. We may be unable to think clearly or creatively enough, unable to find the information and resources we need to achieve the change we want. We may find ourselves endlessly procrastinating, functioning sub-optimally, being hesitant, forgetful, or unmotivated.

Moving to a new country or city can be extremely stressful and challenging, especially when alone with no-one to turn to for advice or share our feelings and concerns. Especially when moving to a place with a very different culture to ours, there’s so much to learn, adapt and adjust to. New ways of understanding and doing things, new norms and values, all of which may play a significant role in how successful and happy we can be.

If you need help
If you need help navigating the changes you are experiencing or would like to bring about, contact me to tell me more about it so that we can determine your needs and see if coaching would be the best solution for you.

Good luck and take good care!

Emmanuelle