Transition: the 4 stages of going across

Posted on July 18, 2011 by Laura Simms, One of Thousands of Career Coaches on Noomii.

I believe that, without exception, the clients I work with are in transition.

Some may identify with the word “transition,” others may not. So I’ve been thinking a lot about transition; what it means, how it happens, and why we need it. I hope that by delving into these ideas, you may be able to identify transitions going on in your life, and navigate them more smoothly.

And navigate is an apt word, because at its Latin root, transition means “a going across.” Yes. It’s a journey, there is movement. It’s also a process. I’m able to identify 4 stages of transition, each a distinct and necessary part of the going across. There is a predictable arch to transition, though it’s quite possible to bounce between stages and have some messy crossover. But let’s take a quick look at each of the 4 on their own.

1. Divine Dissatisfaction

Something’s not right. You may be mad, sad, or deflated. Conflicted. Confused. Agitated. Ornery. This is an uncomfortable but necessary part of transition. You understand that something needs to change, but you may not know what or how.

To borrow from Martha Graham:

“There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction;
a blessed unrest that keeps us marching
and makes us more alive than the others.”

The unrest you’re feeling—consider it marching orders from a divine source. You’re receiving a powerful message that may be disrupting your sleep, happiness, relationships, and sense of purpose. Don’t deny the message. Write it down, talk to someone. Keep listening. You may not like what you hear, but let it come in.

Be gentle with yourself during this time. Consider letting go of some commitments, indulge in lots of self-care, and find moments of light. Things are going to get easier, and you’ll get more clarity in time.

2. Cave Dwelling

It’s time to go inside. You may contemplate & question. You may isolate and withdraw. It’s cocoon time; quiet, contemplative activities are a match. Consider walking, reading, writing, and making art. In a gentle way, you are starting to work through your dissatisfaction. You get glimmers of how things might be different. Eventually, you emerge from your cave for…

3. Exploration

Things are starting to happen. You may feel curious, optimistic, and ready to try new things. You actively seek new experiences. You experiment. You meet new people. Support your impulses and interests—consider traveling, taking a class, and reading up on new interests. A sense of direction emerges. You consciously begin to steer in particular direction.

4. Radiant Ease

This feels good. Dissatisfaction has melted away, and in it’s place is a clear vision. People may comment that you seem brighter or happier. You are active. You may feel energized, passionate, and full of potential. There is a sense of ease and possibility. Things change pretty quickly; you are in motion, and the world around you seems to step up to meet you halfway. Enjoy this stage. You are at the height of your creative powers.

But…it won’t last forever.

Transition is a cycle, and you’ll pass through all the stages again. The best thing you can do is acknowledge each stage and care for yourself according to the stage you’re in.

Are you in a stage of transition right now?

How can you best support yourself given the stage that you’re in?