Influence - Secret Sauce in Leadership

Posted on July 09, 2020 by Veronica Boaz, One of Thousands of Life Coaches on Noomii.

Influence is defined as“the capacity or power of persons or things to be a compelling force on or produce effects on the actions, behavior or opinions of others.” It doesn’t have to be related to title, income or authority. It’s not instant. It’s something that builds over time. It’s the perception that you are the go-to person for clear vision, good advice, getting things done, support and finding answers.

Given that, how do you develop influence? The first and most important thing to realize that you can’t influence people to do what you want them to − you can only influence them to do what they want to do. In fact, if you try to make someone to do what you want, the reaction is always resistance. The leverage is in understanding what it is that someone needs or wants and helping him or her pursue those objectives. Sometimes, he or she has not articulated what the objectives are yet. Influence is about facilitating that articulation and helping someone see the path to achieving those goals.

The fact is, by pursuing your “what I want to do,” you’ll be ignoring someone else’s needs. Influence begins with trying to see the world from another person’s perspective. Influence is not about pushing or pulling; it’s about understanding and empathy.

Building influence is understanding that there is more than one right answer. If you have to prove that you’re right, you will influence no one. If, after listening to another person’s point-of-view, you follow up with an attempt to demonstrate how right you are, you prove that you didn’t hear a word.

In order to build influence, you must be willing to surrender position. We are conditioned to believe that if one person is right, the other is wrong. If one person wins, the other loses. Influence is about creating a collaborative relationship, where someone will trust you with his or her perspective and know that you will provide support and counsel.

Building influence is your willingness to allow someone else to have the “great” idea. Actively pursue the ideas of others. Recognize that the people around you are sources of great expertise, intelligence and creativity. Influence is about finding great ideas and bringing them to life.

Building influence is taking responsibility for your communication. Where is the leverage for change in a pass in a football game? You can work on the receivers, but if the pass is bad, it will still be missed. Communication is just like that pass. When your listener “just doesn’t get it,” it’s not about the listener, it’s about how you communicated your message. Influence is the result of great, clear communication.

When you have helped a customer to get where they need to go, helped a team be successful, helped your brother resolve a problem, the next time people in your life need to get somewhere or accomplish something, they will seek you out.

The result is influence and influence equals leadership.