Posted on June 10, 2011 by Sandra Clifton

In a recent episode of Friday Night Lights–the TV show featuring a town in Texas through the journey of football, friendships, and family–Coach Eric Taylor looks at his team during practice and says, “Success is NOT a goal.  It’s a by-product.”

Wow.  Talk about show-stopping.  In our society of goal-oriented vision and a laser focus on achieving success (however you might define that accomplishment in your life) this is a radical statement…But in my opinion, a true one.  We might like to believe that ‘successful people’ make concrete goals and work hard to achieve them, but the real story is usually far more complex.  Ironically, leaders are often doggedly ignoring the status quo and society’s current definition of success.  If we study the innovators, artists, and entrepreneurs whose lives have deep impact and rich meaning, we soon discover that their journey was rooted in the pursuit of a passion. Regardless of what that meant to others–who sometimes called them crazy–and they were often deemed as anything but “successful”, at least at first.

Take, for example, the current spring exhibit at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, “SAVAGE BEAUTY”, featuring the eclectic collection of fashion designs created by Alexander McQueen.  This artist once famously said, “You’ve got to know the rules to break them. That’s what I’m here for, to demolish the rules but to keep the tradition.”  Although he is now heralded as one of fashion’s most distinctive visionaries, McQueen wasn’t always applauded for his innovative attitude.  Born the son of a taxi driver and a science teacher, the first original creations of Lee Alexander McQueen both shocked and irked early audiences, earning the labels of “l ‘enfant terrible” and “the hooligan of English fashion”.  But this avant-garde designer stayed true to his vision to explore the dark beauty of the human experience through his designs…which are now attracting all walks of life and involve two-hour wait in lines at the MET.

However, risking a new vision is only half of the equation.  Despite being heralded as a genius of his generation, this tortured soul took his life last year in February 2010 – perhaps the result of depression and episodes of extreme anxiety, though none of us knows for sure.  We can only imagine how differently McQueen’s life would have unfolded if this sensitive soul had the support of an intuitive coach…Because, you see, his success was a stunning by-product.  But his life, in all its artistry, didn’t seem worth living.

That’s what Coach Taylor was talking about:  making a deeper commitment past investing athletic talent or risking artistic vision into a place of defining core values.  The world of fashion, design, sports, business, education, politics – you name it – only holds so much allure, no matter how high we climb on the ladder of “success.”  Part of a coach’s mission in any situation is to clarify and filter through these external details, to guide and inspire our clients to create an inner landscape of truth and trust.  There is no doubt that Alexander McQueen knew how to tailor incredible costumes - but the savage truth of his beautiful designs is that he might have had trouble living comfortably in his own skin.

That’s the value of coaching: to help clients create a life of delightful design, from the inside out.  Success then becomes a beautiful by-product to celebrate when you’re standing strong, long after the “fashion of success” fades, and the lines of fans have gone home…